Today, I was pushed over and robbed in a parking lot by a man in an ugly Christmas sweater. When I looked up, I was too distracted by the sweater to even look at his face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML
Today, I was mugged. I saw a cop car in the aftermath and flagged it down. Unfortunately, when the cops stopped the mugger, he said he'd been running away because I tried to mug him. Apparently the fact that he was "well-dressed" and I wasn't means he was telling the truth. FML
Today, I wore my Christmas sweater to work, one with lights sewn into it. Halfway through a meeting, they started flashing uncontrollably and playing tinny carols. I couldn’t turn them off. I had to go shove the whole sweater into a locker in the basement. FML
Today, I was robbed while recovering from a robbery. FML
Today, I got mugged in broad daylight, in a park, by a teenage girl. To top it off, I'm a grown man. FML
Today, while walking down the street, I was violently beaten up by a man in a Darth Vader outfit. FML
Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML
Today, I parked my car on the street late at night, when I was distracted by a text message. Some guy then gets in my passenger side. Panicked, thinking I was being robbed, I bolt out of my car bruising my head and dropping my phone onto the pavement. The guy meant to get in the car behind me. FML
Today, my friends and I were going to do an ugly sweater photo shoot. When we met up, one of them was wearing a sweater I gave on her birthday. FML
Today, I saw a homeless guy in the street. It really upset me how everyone's spirit of giving vanished as soon as Christmas was over, so I said fuck it and gave him about $50 worth of money. I barely made it 10 feet away, when another guy mugged him for the money I just gave. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
slushpup9696 12
Gotta compliment the technique, nobody ever expects the "ugly sweater mugging".
fancyclown 9
Hey man, when grandma makes you a sweater, you wear that shit.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (131)
BrittanyPernell6 0
If you didn't look at his face how do you know it was a man? It may have been an old lady with too much testosterone hince the sweater. O.0
Kayla8795 2
He was looking at the sweater. Obviously no boobies
adele20 2
Well... Either u have ADD..I mean how can u get distracted and not look the robber in the face?.... OR!! This is just a lame excuse to look the doosh in the face and say give my shit back!! And then kick him in the crotch and run away!! :) then ur woulda been solved...
fangz_fml 6
Can't be uglier than mine!!
jessimica642 8
Gasp! It was you!!!
HaraAishi 8
MrMisfit, I love you. That sucks but it's an amazing technique. They might be able to I.D. him based on that. Besides, if OP was looking at the sweater, they could potentially notice an Adam's apple, broader shoulders, lack of breasts, other clothing in general to notice it was a man. You don't need to look at faces to tell gender, necessarily.
GoW_Chick 15
The beginning of your comment was random ... Watch out though a lot of people don't like him you might get caught in the crossfire. *angry mob appears* well would you look at the time got to go.
snafu63 0
wow, you are very stupid then.
miranda_otzwirk 5
True true don't worry I'd do the same thing
TheHolyLama 0
hey, now you can report him as 'man with the ugly sweater' to the police!
ntm_fml 0
Well it's not that weird because mostly when people are in a threatening situation they only notice the uncommon things (also known as the weapon focus effect) . FYL because it happens to all of us.
Th3eXeCuTiOn3r 0
I guess it worked..?
bigggd15 3
" take the money!, just get rid of that sweater! my god man "