Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found a bug in my bra. Not a huge deal, so I flicked him out. Turns out he was a black blister beetle. I woke to at 3 a.m. to insane pain, as well as the water blisters all over my boobs. FML
Today, I noticed a small bite on my arm. I couldn't figure out what it came from until I saw a small insect crawling out of my bra. FML
Today, as someone with a large chest, I'm used to sometimes finding food in my clothes at the end of the day. However, when I took off my bra off, I found half of a dead grasshopper. FML
Today, I was so tired when I got home from work, I took off my bra without removing my shirt which I've done so often it is second nature. I successfully removed the bra, then snagged the clasp on a loose shirt thread, causing my bra to take on a life of its own and slap me in the face. FML
Today, I got a bug bite on my boob. I scratched it so much it started bleeding so I put a bandaid on it. Turns out the band-aid had latex in it and I got an allergic reaction to it. The bug bite is still bleeding and the top half of my boob is swollen. FML
Today, my nose had been feeling weirdly uncomfortable all day. After I got home, I blew my nose really hard. I found that a bug had been resting inside my nose the entire time. FML
Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML
Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML
Today, as I bent over to pick up my baby, a wasp flew into my bra. I jumped up in a panic, flattening the wasp between my boob and my bra, where it stung me on the nipple, which is now swollen, a funny colour, and throbbing. Did I mention the nipple was already irritated from breastfeeding? FML
Today, I travelled to the beach, and I got what I thought was a food crumb in my phone charger port. I poked it around and it was so gross to realize that it was an insect. I removed the bug with a tissue corner, used an old brush to clean the rest up. I panicked and thought it was a bug infestation in my hostel room. FML
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Top comments
amberr_harperr 15
Just imagine the pain it went through. Death by suffocation of boob.
chocolatelover96 14
At least the bug died happy OP :)
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Comments (112)
amberr_harperr 15
Just imagine the pain it went through. Death by suffocation of boob.
Dingodile_fml 11
I could think of worse ways to die ;)
mohamed_H 21
Bug: totally worth it ?
JohnTheDonJuan 11
Maybe it wasn't suffocated. It may have drowned in boob sweat.
shadowshalf 8
1000 ways to die
XxxMiseryxxX_fml 10
That's how I want to die
Gillett 23
Yes#55, Yes!
JohnYio 6
There's a malay ghost that does that
becauseracecar 3
Best way to die
lexiieeex3 32
Dying right now because this FML was stolen... -_-
funkypenguin 7
Breast way to die*
chocolatelover96 14
At least the bug died happy OP :)
shemademedoit 20
her boobs must be numb if she didn't felt the bug
chocolatelover96 14
#97, as a woman, trust me when I say that we can go hours without realising something has fallen into our cleavage. I had a similar experience with a small spider
Thomas_The_Dank 6
At least he went peacefully :p
joelp232 17
possibly the best way to die
e_is_for_eli 12
it's the breast way to die
WafflePunch 11
Not the worst way to go.
WCARlover 35
Apparently boobs can be used as weapons two ways
MrConcise 35
Austin Powers begs to differ, racking up the count to three with boobie machine guns.
MrConcise 35
I'm so disappointed nobody caught the rack pun. Or maybe they did and it wasn't as clever as I thought.
Nagas 4
Was about to say about the rack pun, and saw your other comment. It's pretty groovy
ber4fun 23
Better a warm boob than a hard shoe.
Yolomcswaggin420 17
Well I guess that's what you call a flat out coincidence
Zebediabolical 45
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
He was hungry and just wanted to breast-feed.
DFMLharsh 20
Logically, the bug would want to be breast-fed. The bug was hungry and wanted to breast-feed is just wrong my friend. Kindly roll over in shame, please.
Zebediabolical 45
Being breast-fed implies the mother would be willing to have a bug on her nipple. Wanting to breast-feed doesn't need to be consensual. As in the case of a bug. As such, I stand by my original statement.
johhnyboy39 11
It's a bug it doesn't breast feed since it's not a mammal