Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was making out with this hot girl at a party. She was a bad kisser and I meant to say, "It's like you're 16 and don't know how to kiss" but it came out as, "It's like I'm kissing a 16 year-old." The room fell silent and she got off my lap with a disturbed look on her face. FML
Today, I was making out with some girl at a party and noticed that she wasn't very good at it. I tried to say, "You kiss like a 16 year-old doing it for the first time" but ended up saying, "You kiss like a 16 year-old." Upon saying that, a dozen people turned and looked at me, giving weird looks. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's extended family for the first time. Her family kept telling her how much I looked and acted like her older brother and I'm guessing by the end of the day she agreed, because now she pulls away and gags when I try to kiss her. FML
Today, I went in for a hug with my friend, but she leaned in for a kiss on the cheek at the same time. What followed was a full-on awkward face collision where I ended up kissing her on the lips. We both stood there, staring at each other before I muttered, “Sorry, gross." She really took it personally. FML
Today, I've been so accustomed to kissing my girlfriend that when I gave my best bud a hug, I kissed him on the neck. FML
Today, I was saying goodbye to a friend after a long day out. I went for a hug, and as I pulled away, I kissed her on the cheek for some reason. Realising it was an awkward mistake, I pulled back even more and said, "Sorry, I thought you were my mum." She looked at me confused, and we both stood there in complete silence for what felt like hours. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML
Today, I walked my girlfriend home. As I kissed her goodbye, I heard a high-pitched scream and turned just in time to see her little brother charge head-first into my nuts. All because I kissed her on the cheek. FML
Today, at the age of 17, I had my first kiss with the girl I've liked for over a year. However, it was a stage kiss and the girl has made it clear that she finds me repulsive. FML
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Top comments
xSphinx 18
That's both an FML and a WTF
Cass_x 22
How does she know what her brother kisses like? D:
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Comments (157)
SlipperyNipple 9
@#2 Cass_X. Thank you ted, that WAS the joke...
HorrorJr 26
......... Donezo
lsvxoxo 12
What the...?
OgBloodRaven 10
You aren't from Arkansas by any chance are you?
OgBloodRaven 10
You people who downvoted must have never been to the parts of Arkansas i have... Trust me on this one you don't want to...
alidills 7
'Merica
nitrog100 21
There aren't exactly a lot of option in Wyoming, so I can easily see that happening. Just roll with it OP; she's making out with you now.
cjfred 13
You were making out with Angelina Jolie?! Don't let Brad Pitt find out; he only shares her with Billy Bob.
galintheis 2
maybe she was pulling a back to the future line to be cute
Pyro3000 6
What else do you do like him?
SeriousJoker72 18
Run.