Today, I was leaving the car wash when I saw my friend walking on the sidewalk. I pulled over next to her and asked if she wanted a ride. Only after getting a face full of the soda she was drinking did I realize I was talking to a complete stranger. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I hopped into what I thought was my friend’s car, sat down, and started chatting away about the trip to Vegas we were about to hit the road for. After a few moments of awkward silence, I looked up to see a terrified stranger staring at me. I was very close to getting maced. FML
Today, I was getting picked up by my dad after I had been swimming. I saw his car, so I walked over to it, got in and started talking about how I'd seen my brother. It wasn't until after I had put my seat belt on that I realized I was talking to a complete stranger. FML
Today, I got rear-ended. An old woman got out and came over to my car window. I thought she was coming to apologize and trade insurance companies. Instead, she poured her soda on my head, ran back into her car, and drove away. FML
Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML
Today, I left a coffee shop abruptly to go to my car to let out some really bad and loud gas. My window was partly open because it's broken. A stranger was walking on the sidewalk in front of me. He looked terrified. FML
Today, I walked up to my friend and slapped her ass, because that’s what we always do. Turns out, it wasn’t my friend, it was a total stranger. FML
Today, I was driving with my mom. She had some soda with her from earlier, and even though it was probably warm, I was thirsty. I ask for a sip, she hands it to me and says sure. And I get a mouthful of ash-and-cigarette-butt-filled soda. Apparently she didn't feel the need to mention this to me. FML
Today, I went to my favorite drive-in burger joint for dinner. As I was nearing the end of my burger, I grabbed a cup from the cup holder that I thought was filled with soda. Instead, I got a mouthful of dip spit that a friend left in my car. FML
Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML
Today, I was waiting for a friend to pick me up. It was after dark and I was nervous, so when he pulled up I immediately jumped in the car. The young girl in the driver's seat started freaking out, screaming and punching me in the face repeatedly. I'd accidentally gotten in the wrong car. FML
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Top comments
Stinkis 0
I don't know if you're life is ****** because of it, but the girl was clearly overtracting. You get a FML from me.
lilykat84 4
wow and a simple no wouldn't have done. or maybe you just look creepy :)
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Comments (105)
MasterE56 4
lol that's random
rencegoh 0
HAHAHAHAHAS
iSpasticFantasti 14
What a nice friend, you two must be so close, I bet you guys see eachother so often that her appearance is just branded into the back of your eyelids.
MeganCello 8
@#60 wish I could say the same. Where I live the temprature didn't go above 35 degrees.
jakeisawake 3
#88 I'll gladly swap you for a winter; just let me know when the snow starts falling, and I'll be down for snowboarding. Unless your topography isn't one for snowboarding, then I'll stick to surfing.
dulcebrandi 0
Wow! She could have just said, "No, thanks." People can be so outrageous.
77taylah33 0
FREE DRINK!!bthat's a plus lol
mtnairtom 0
you perv. sure it was your friend O_o
angel55033 12
did your raper van you were driving say free candy on the side? if not than who'd want in psht
johnnyrowanatkin 0
lol.
MeganCello 8
@91 it should be coming any day now. I live in Colorado. Surfing? Hell yes I'll trade you!
jakeisawake 3
******* sweet.