Today, I was in traffic court trying to get out of a ticket. The judge called my defense "complete, unadulterated bullshit." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to contest a parking ticket in court. I came out 3 hours later, all charges clear, to a new parking ticket on my windshield, for the same amount I just got cleared. FML
Today, I got so anxious while trying to fight the ticket I got earlier this month that I passed out in front of the judge. FML
Today, I just about managed to convince the judge to overlook my client's emotional outbursts in the courtroom, promising that he'd be on his best behavior from now on. An hour later, he screamed "FUCK YOU!" at the judge for telling him to quiet down. I hate my job. FML
Today, I went to court because I got a traffic ticket for running a red light. While I was in court, I found out it was actually for a car I had sold years ago. FML
Today, I had my first appearance in a court as an attorney. I called the prosecution the prostitution. FML
Today, I got a speeding ticket while driving to my court date for a prior speeding ticket. FML
Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML
Today, in court, my client ran his mouth at the judge, cursing him out and then trying to lecture him on "freedom of speech" when he was found in contempt. I don't know what it is with these nutjobs, but I wish I'd never become a public defender. FML
Today, I was on the way to traffic court for a $340 speeding ticket I'd got. My mother called me and I wasn't paying attention which caused me to speed. Right past a cop. When I told the cop where I was going, he started laughing at me. I now have another $300 ticket. FML
Today, while leaving our county courthouse after testifying as the arresting officer in multiple DWI cases, I hit a wrong way sign in the court’s parking lot. All the defense attorneys were outside, asking me if I was drunk. FML
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Top comments
CoolRainbowdash 15
He is right, it is bullshit.
Irishgypsy 2
I'm out of order? You're out of order! This whole damn court room is out of order!!!
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Comments (132)
CoolRainbowdash 15
He is right, it is bullshit.
doctorhook86 25
More like horseshit...Mustang shit, even.
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
Guess not everything is bigger in Texas. In this case, his little head
wetFeline 3
Wrong. Bull shit is the waist that come out of a bull
mizuki123 8
Waste*
Dr0reos 8
You should have pulled my patented move:the dr.oreos triple power-play. It's where you jump on the desk rip off all your clothes and throw your own excrement at people while screaming "I PLEED INSANITY!!!"
SqueakyChipmunk 22
If the waist comes out of a bull, you have a serious problem.
shellz102 12
This makes me wonder what OP said...
tjv3 10
Hey OP I'm in Texas I think I know that judge lol. It's probably my uncle he hates people that lie to try and get out of a ticket. He goes easier on the people that are truthful . This one guy was like I just messed up and I was in the wrong. He put him on deferred judification for a whole 24 hrs. Honesty really is the best policy
Lucious306 7
Can they even talk like that in court?
that1guy1 13
And who's gonna tell them not to? The judge? See what the problem with your comment is?
lobum 12
I once had a judge tell me that I had ruined my life, and that I would never ammount to anything. All for ONE minor posession chargez
loganberrybat 11
I concur - you are unlikely to amount to anything given your atrocious spelling and grammar. Sort that out and maybe you'll have a shot. Start by giving up the weed and going to school, eh?
unknown_user5566 27
63- You're 16 and you already have a possesion charge? Eesh...
KiddNYC1O 22
88- Are you really surprised?
SW500 13
16 and have a picture of presumably you smoking. Not very bright, are we?
killdozer1 2
I do find his choice of words extremely unprofessional, calling into question the legitimacy of the trial.
lobum 12
I was on a mobile app. The fact that I can't correct my poor grammar after i post is sort of shitty.
wetFeline 3
Haha thts wut u git fer drivn a gay carr
wetFeline 3
Gezz it is hard to type shitty on an iphone
hornetsbaseball 6
What court was this at!?
everydayFML2121 5
Probably somewhere in the heart of detroit
zachherbert 10
Judge Judy
Quinn32 16
Traffic court. No need to thank me.
mykalt18 2
On a tennis court.
meihua 19
27 texas
Clamcreepy 7
Looks like you'll be paying that bullshit
kscogin55 12
Lol xD next time don't do anything to get the ticket in the first place, then the judge never would've said anything like that to you ;)
tomhofer 14
not that easy once you're cruising down the road its hard to resist letting her rip
laden_swallow09 35
Impulse control. Use it.
Jrod85 0
5: Who cares.
Irishgypsy 2
I'm out of order? You're out of order! This whole damn court room is out of order!!!
OhDearBetrayal 25
10 days in jail for disrespecting the court for you.
KVKdragon 26
Reminds of Patrick Jane in that one episode of The Mentalist ;)
JustKittyKat 24
The soda machine is out of order...
SetThaTone 0
Tenth
s0m3guy2010 21
You see... I was trying to go the speed limit but I accidentally hits the gas instead of the brake. After I noticed that, I tried to switch over, but I had an in uncontrollable muscle spasm in my leg that stopped me from doing it.
s0m3guy2010 21
Hit* not hits. My phone screws up my spelling more than I do.
BunchieRules 31
I don't normally do this, but... your picture matches perfectly with that comment. True story.