Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in the supermarket when I saw a little boy trying to reach for something on the top shelf. I went over to him and asked if his mom knew where he was. The boy turned around. He was actually a very angry midget. FML
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML
Today, at work, a little girl was misbehaving. Her dad told her that she would look like me when she grows up. The little girl look horrified while Daddy laughed and kept reassuring her he was "just kidding." FML
Today, at the mall my brother and I went to look at a vendor's items when my mom said not to touch anything. Thinking my brother was standing next to me, I saw him touching stuff so I smacked him in the arm and told him to stop. I turn to see that the old lady to my side was giving me a mean look. FML
Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML
Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML
Today, a bratty kid at Walmart called my mom a "fat bitch" when she wasn't walking fast enough for him. Enraged, I gave him the meanest death glare I could muster and I tore him a new one, right in front of his mother, who then defended her kid, saying that my mom and I should both lose a few pounds. FML
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Top comments
curzy 6
assault. file a police report Lol.
Jewelofagal 2
Don't know why you went along with the Mother's "evil giant" comment. It's not good to cater to people who insult you. Should this ever happen again, consider saying with a stone-cold facial expression, "Pardon? I'm not a giant and I'm not evil."
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Comments (157)
stlphil 0
How dare you, you evil giant, she says in a sexy English accent.
Sleekhope 0
Ouch. You should have choke slammed her. And then went 'Tell your mum not to hit evil giants, kid'.
xchrist 0
you sir have made my day
Link5794 18
Win! But in all actuality, OP shouldn't really do that.
amerwin 3
That sucks man. I would have been furious.
zombiekitten87 12
wow WTF did u do that made her slap you? lol unless she just finds tall people to be evil
tweetbaby14 18
tall people are evil. as a short person (5'2.5") I have been subject to their never ending torture of: poking, short jokes, using me as an arm rest, and tall threats ie. don't make me step on you. see what I mean?
wwerulez14 6
While what you say is true; about how us short people (I'm like 5"3') get picked on, it doesn't make tall people evil. Just think of it this way... If a tall person is making fun of you for being short, obviously they're not comfortable with being that tall, and make fun of you to make themselves feel better. I've heard a LOT of comments on my height as early as elementary school. But around 8th grade, I realized I don't care. Anyone who has a problem with it, obviously has a problem of they're own they refuse to deal with so whatever.... Hope this helps :) oh and OP, you really shoulda just looked her straight in the eye with that "I WILL cut a bitch" look in your eyes. Watch that lady grab her kid and run for the hills :D
ohthebloodygore 16
29, 59, be quiet! You're both evil giants. I'm 4'7. People don't assault me or use me as an arm wrest because I have a wicked temper. Try it.
wwerulez14 6
Hmm... that WOULD work. Except I'm not an angry person. And I actually haven't been called short in years, mainly because all the freshies at my high school are shorter than I WAS when I was a freshman. So not really my problem anymore :)
ohthebloodygore 16
88, all I heard was you're not mean, not your problem and American. No idea.
SmallTownCutie 0
I'm 5'7"(: not too tall or too short(:
RedPillSucks 33
Short people are also a good place to rest your beer.
DarkHelmet 10
become the evil giant and slap her back...TWICE!!! once for calling you something u weren't and once more for slapping you for playing along to her rouse
Miolene 6
She can't go around slapping people, thats assault. I would have reported her to the manager of the store to get her banned from there, and definatly file a police report. What kind of life lessons is she teaching her kid anyway, that its ok to just slap someone if you feel like it? I also would have been offended at the "evil giant" comment, but since I'm only 5ft I will never get that.
BoCo_fml 9
No but you are an evil little pigmy! Just kidding...I'm really short too.
LoudSilence 0
Ya lol I'm 5 ft 1 I used to get teased alot but it was all good, I accutually love being smaller I guess im just okay with it cause I have an athletic body.
Schazam 0
Go to a short people convention then you will be called an evil giant.
goldenone 2
where in Houston do you live? I live in friendswood! =D
BoyFromTheFuture 0
friendswood sucks cocks n diks
ParadoxTheory 3
What a refreshing little nugget of wisdom, 34.
BoyFromTheFuture 0
fe fi foe fum... slap that bitch for being dumb.
Mylees 0
for real? I'm having a hard time believing this. she is a mean/uncultivated bitch, and you are stupid
taybowden 2
how dare she slap u! they started it!