Today, a bratty kid at Walmart called my mom a "fat bitch" when she wasn't walking fast enough for him. Enraged, I gave him the meanest death glare I could muster and I tore him a new one, right in front of his mother, who then defended her kid, saying that my mom and I should both lose a few pounds. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML
Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML
Today, when I told a gentleman that, no, he couldn't have cash back on his return without a receipt, he started screaming at me that I was calling his mother a liar. He told me to lawyer up and yelled at me for smiling at him. He also screamed at me to go on a diet as he left the store. FML
Today, a demon child called my severely arthritic mom a "bitch," all because she was walking too slowly for his liking. After verbally tearing him apart for daring to speak to anyone like that, his mom quickly rushed to his defense, even though she was close enough to hear what he'd said about my mom. I can't win. FML
Today, I told my son he couldn't have a toy. He threw a fit, looked me in the eye, and screamed, "Daddy's right! You are a bitch!" The whole store was watching. FML
Today, I saw a kid throwing a tantrum in a supermarket. Thinking it was a matter of lack of discipline, I waited for the kid’s mother to come out of the bathroom to tell her how naughty her son was being. I then got to watch her beat her son to the point of unconsciousness. FML
Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life." I'm 26 and just very short. FML
Today, I helped a 6 year-old boy who was left alone at a store to get back home. The kid's parents were grateful, but my mother cussed me out and called me stupid for helping the kid. No good dead goes unpunished. FML
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Top comments
cuz803 46
Yeah, someone is getting knocked the **** out. I have zero tolerance for people who talk bad about my mom. The kid shouldn't be hit but the kid's mom can get it. I'm a dude who almost never hits women but I'll drop a bitch for disrespecting my family. That lady verbally assaulted and disrespected your mom so it's warranted you whup that ass.
hdisnfjs91 21
Can clearly see where the kid gets his shitty attitude!!
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Comments (5)
cuz803 46
Yeah, someone is getting knocked the **** out. I have zero tolerance for people who talk bad about my mom. The kid shouldn't be hit but the kid's mom can get it. I'm a dude who almost never hits women but I'll drop a bitch for disrespecting my family. That lady verbally assaulted and disrespected your mom so it's warranted you whup that ass.
RichardPencil 32
Well, while you're on a roll*, why not tear Karen a new one, too? *(better not go there).
hdisnfjs91 21
Can clearly see where the kid gets his shitty attitude!!
mccuish 25
I would never hit a woman, but I’d knock that lady out for disrespecting my family
ChipBoundary 9
While the kid was out of line for saying that, there is nothing that infuriates me more in a store than people that move slow through aisles or stop so people can't get around you, like exactly opposite another person stopped in an aisle. Move with some purpose, get what you need, and leave. Don't be lollygagging or socializing in the middle of Wal-Mart.