Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it was the first time I was about to have sex with my girlfriend of 3 years, since I'm self-conscious about my size. When she saw it, she started laughing. She was mad I didn't want to continue. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I'd dated girls with smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML
Today, I learned that my insecurities regarding my dick size were unfounded, as my girlfriend gushed over my dick and said it was amazing. We then got down to business, and almost immediately heard, "Ow! Fuck, that's my cervix! This hurts! Stop!" FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having a casual conversation, when the topic suddenly became my penis. Before I knew what was going on, she said, "It's not the size that matters though. It's how you use it. So I guess you're ok." FML
Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML
Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML
Today, I knew I was a small guy and finally about to get laid for the first time in years. Everything was going great, until she got my pants off. She stared at it, stared at me, stared back at it and said, "Yeah, that’s not gonna happen." Got dressed and left. Sadly this has happened many times. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend asked me, "Are you sure you're a guy?" I still have no idea what that was for. FML
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Top comments
graycee7 0
that is so horrible. Dump her.
rainesan 0
Well, considering that 90% of nerve endings in the ****** are in the first inch or so of the ****** (especially near the opening) and the g-spot is only about 2 inches in there isn't really a need for a large penis...really a large penis would miss those most sensitive areas
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Comments (99)
jim_witness 0
just tell her, "well no, but there is a lot of room in here." start lifting your foot...
girlgeorge_fml 0
shes kinda a bitch huh? but unless its really thin, like a pencil dick, i dont see why you would need a long one.
xRedNormandyx 0
8 is ******* hilarious. and to 34, u are a ******* genius and to 46 lol
pewp 5
dump the b*tch. she probably thinks that well-endowed means a 14-inch d*ck.
iTransform 8
my cervix just cried
Eryx_fml 3
Wow that really sucks... She can go **** herself, not gonna find anything longer there...
jsmith1199 4
thats when u ask her if she ever got made fun of for having such a smelly pussy
dinosareawesome 0
Haha, I liked #8's answer.
HRaeH 0
Dump her. She sounds like a total box.
SgtSchadenfreude 0
My advice: You shouldn't be honoring a superficial trollop like that with your time or your essence, since she obviously lacks the taste, discernment, or depth of character to care about any part of a man that isn't dangling between his legs. There are REAL women out there who will love you for you if you put momentary gratification aside long enough to spot one.
okaywell 0
you should grow a larger dick.