Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it was the first time I was about to have sex with my girlfriend of 3 years, since I'm self-conscious about my size. When she saw it, she started laughing. She was mad I didn't want to continue. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I'd dated girls with smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML
Today, I learned that my insecurities regarding my dick size were unfounded, as my girlfriend gushed over my dick and said it was amazing. We then got down to business, and almost immediately heard, "Ow! Fuck, that's my cervix! This hurts! Stop!" FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having a casual conversation, when the topic suddenly became my penis. Before I knew what was going on, she said, "It's not the size that matters though. It's how you use it. So I guess you're ok." FML
Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML
Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML
Today, I knew I was a small guy and finally about to get laid for the first time in years. Everything was going great, until she got my pants off. She stared at it, stared at me, stared back at it and said, "Yeah, that’s not gonna happen." Got dressed and left. Sadly this has happened many times. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend asked me, "Are you sure you're a guy?" I still have no idea what that was for. FML
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Top comments
graycee7 0
that is so horrible. Dump her.
rainesan 0
Well, considering that 90% of nerve endings in the ****** are in the first inch or so of the ****** (especially near the opening) and the g-spot is only about 2 inches in there isn't really a need for a large penis...really a large penis would miss those most sensitive areas
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Comments (99)
Rollercoaster_fml 0
#34... thinking positive is good, but you have to admit if you had to chose whether your bf, hypothetically speaking, gets a small or big penis, you'd take the big one. It's comments like yours that give guys false hope. Its better to know the truth and work from there.
heathallin 0
ive never been told it by a girl, i guess theyve all been nice, but i feel the pain.
Warlock_fml 0
You should have punched her right in the ****. Yeah, ruin her shit.
Warlock_fml 0
@ 39 Wanna do another guy with a small dick? :-D
bigweber77 0
lol i feel for you bro. Not everyone has a big unit... and rofl at 21
mylifesuxass 0
damnnnn, shove a pencil up her ass
alplhawolf0019 0
Dump her. If she actually gives a rats ass about what sort of person you are, she wouldn't have said that sort of thing unless she was nonchalantly joking- which is still uncalled for.
Thechea 0
You should tell her you do get made fun of in the locker room, but not for having a small dick, but for being with her. Then call her a ****, backhand the girl, put on your top hat, and walk out the door.
TURBO007420 0
LMAO @ #21......Chris Brown that bitch On a serious note, you should never, ever, ever hit a woman....but you can shake the shit out of one!!!
strawmaster 0
hahaha thats a low blow