Today, I found out why the amount of mouthwash hasn't been decreasing much recently when I walked in on my dad using it and then spitting some of it back in the bottle. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my roommate spits the mouthwash back into the bottle after he gargles. FML
Today, I saw my boyfriend spitting the mouthwash back into the bottle, because, "this stuff is really expensive." FML
Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML
Today, I noticed a strange mark on the inside of my mouthwash bottle. As I was bending down to investigate, my hands tightened around the bottle and mouthwash squirted in my eye. It still burns. FML
Today, I found my dad using my bathroom. Why? Because he "had to take a crap" and didn't want to stink up his own bathroom. FML
Today, I accidentally took my mouthwash like a shot. I don't know what burned more, when it went down or when it came back up. FML
Today, I was in a rush to get to work and decided to multitask by making my coffee while brushing my teeth. Halfway through, I absentmindedly poured mouthwash into my coffee mug and took a big gulp. I spent the rest of the morning trying to get the taste of minty coffee out of my mouth. FML
Today, I woke up and put my contacts in. It appears that I got drunk enough last night that instead of soaking my contacts in contact solution, I used mouthwash. FML
Today, like every morning, I washed my mouthguard with bar soap. Tonight, though, I realized I hadn’t rinsed as well as I should have, there's soap between my teeth. FML
Today, my dad was making coffee for the family. Half-way through, he excused himself to the bathroom, so for a laugh, I discreetly poured a load of salt into his drink. When he served us, I drank a mouthful and doubled over hacking. My dad barked, "I wasn't born yesterday, son." FML
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Top comments
xxlk4xx 6
ewwww! I guess time to buy your own personal mouthwash and let your dad keep doing his weird ass shit lol, also maybe let your mom know what you saw so she isn't unknowingly using it too!
RichardPencil 32
You should get travel-sized bottles and keep them in your pocket at all times. Congrats to your dad on his thriftiness and frugality!
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Comments (3)
xxlk4xx 6
ewwww! I guess time to buy your own personal mouthwash and let your dad keep doing his weird ass shit lol, also maybe let your mom know what you saw so she isn't unknowingly using it too!
RichardPencil 32
You should get travel-sized bottles and keep them in your pocket at all times. Congrats to your dad on his thriftiness and frugality!
BurnInDemonFire 39
Wait... you all use the same mouthwash? Grody! This is the exact reason you should have your own!
Ambrily 27
Do you spit your mouthwash back in the bottle too?
BurnInDemonFire 39
No, I spit it into the sink. And I don't share a bottle with my roommate.