Today, I was getting intimate with my boyfriend, when my upstairs neighbor decided to take the longest piss known to man. He moaned the entire time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I noticed that the walls of my apartment are ridiculously thin, when I heard my neighbor slowly walk up the stairs, slam the bathroom door, lift the toilet cover, take a pee and end with a nice "AAHH." FML
Today, sick of the unfiltered noise we hear from our neighbours in our upstairs apartment, as we're above their fence line, we signed the lease on an apartment downstairs. While I was downstairs, my partner clomped upstairs, opened the bathroom door, and took a piss. I heard EVERYTHING. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to show off one of his favorite skills: Peeing on my ceiling. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML
Today, I was having sexy time with my girlfriend when she said she needed to pee. She came back 5 minutes later and started talking about how she hasn't seen her best friend in ages and misses her. Needless to say, I couldn't get the man downstairs back up when we continued. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me into the bathroom and proudly showed me how far back he could stand from the toilet while he peed. Unfortunately, he got distracted and peed all over the floor I had mopped just an hour before. FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
BountyBass 13
Moan louder
iLike2Teabag 27
Hey, sometimes relieving yourself can feel better than sex.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (74)
trellz17 19
Use his moans for stimulation.
Nikkitaria 9
Come moan OP. If you can hear him piss, he can hear you do a lot more.
sjdbeinska 4
if the walls are thin enough for you to hear him pissing then you probs shouldnt be getting too intimate at your place
lysx84 24
Then where? Thin walls would not stop me doing what I like in my own home.
Pleonasm 36
Then he can moan and piss too. But this seems to put OP ill at ease, so we are saying: consider others, baceause he has to listen to OP too.
TheNewGuy03 29
Oh, kids, no need to piss and moan about it. By the way, if you are living in a place, you pretty much have the right to do what the **** you wanna do -- within reason, of course. If I went to my neighbor and told him/her to stop getting intimate with whomever they are getting intimate, I can almost guarantee that I will receive a big fat "**** you."
darkfire4eva 15
well thats funny. Payback can be a b!tch. Just wait till he's least expecting it
ender6137 5
Just laugh it off. Have a good time together. Don't worry about everything being perfect.
amifaiyaz 12
two can play at that game.
iAmKirsty 8
maybe he wanted to take part in a moaning competition..
SoIsYourFace 4
I don't know where you live but usually you shouldn't be able to to hear someone piss even of they are in the next room never mind upstairs.
TheNewGuy03 29
This reminds me of a Ghostface Killah line from "Alex": "Took a piss/ the shit felt like a nut" True story -- when you gotta piss *that* bad, it feels reeeeeal good when you're relieved.
Lotterie 10
Wrong person to moan...