Today, I was eating at a Mexican restaurant with my sister. I was happily biting into a burrito, when I saw a man in his car in the restaurant parking lot, staring at us and jacking off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was eating lunch in my car. There was a cute guy, also in his car, who kept smiling at me and winking with a cheeky grin. I considered giving him my number but his girlfriend suddenly sat up from having her head in his lap, wiping her mouth. He was getting a blowjob the entire time. FML
Today, I was at my favorite Mexican restaurant when I realized my really cute waiter, along with his buddies kept looking at me and smiling. Trying to be cool, I took a bite of my burrito, choked, and spilled ground beef down my new shirt and in my bra. They laughed the whole time. FML
Today, while I was waiting at a bus stop, a man stopped at the red light and smiled at me. I smiled back. He blew me a kiss and drove away, just as I realized he was masturbating behind the wheel. FML
Today, while driving, I saw a car pull over with its hazard lights on. I went to see if they needed help, only to see the guy was jerking off to something on his phone. FML
Today, I got lost in a car park, late at night, unable to find my car. I started panicking, so I called my dad. I sat down to catch my breath. After about 2 minutes, I heard a noise. I looked up to see a guy jerking off while watching me. He smiled, so I instinctively threw my backpack at his junk and he ran off. FML
Today, I saw a ridiculously hot guy dining with his family. I decided not to flirt with him with his parents around but to ask his sister (who went to the restroom) to give him my phone number. When I came back, I saw her pointing a finger at me, and the whole family turning around and staring. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my friends, when a creepy man sat at the table next to us, and started rubbing his crotch, his gaze never leaving my feet. FML
Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend about some recent family drama my sister has been causing. He quickly lost interest and started jacking off right next to me. FML
Today, I saw my best friend's car in the parking lot of the store, so I ran over to say hi, since I'm secretly in love with him. I saw him and his girlfriend getting nasty in the back. I'm now at home, crying and masturbating. FML
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Top comments
knibbsy 4
I hope you waved! Nothing would kill his boner like doing the opposite of what he expects. Actually, you should have held up your hand up to the window and spaced your index finger and thumb about 2 inches apart, to indicate that he has a tiny little penis. Do that while laughing.
x_Cupcakes 0
Disturbing!
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Comments (199)
GotALife 11
Men should not be look in intrest at little girls. If he go after you then you better call me, i'll straighten him.>:(
sccrismyantidrg 4
#131 I remember a lot of stuff that happened in kindergarten AND I started school early, so I was pretty young. Maybe you were a little slow in the brain development area then?
AlexPancake 0
Well first of all, ew. And second, stop eating burritos like a *****. XD
andrew111193 0
you're an idiot 104
XxMoonGirlAshomi 0
0.o what's jacking off mean... *feels stupid*
Sileny 0
It's slang for masturbating lol.
Nickolazx 0
3 wtf
Borus1295 0
lol at #38 and that isn't disturbing at all sucks to be you
yourlifesfucked 0
I'm an idiot because I make comments that are in response to the one to which I am replying? Or because I happen to like a band that is epic enough to win a grammy for Heavy Metal ( the first one, mind you), while being fronted by a flaotist? Stupid troll is stupid.
Houdeka 0
should of offered him a tit view. maybe that burrito would of been free.
kbn 0
what. the. f***!