Today, I was cooking. I leaned over the stove to preheat the oven, and burned my nipple on a pot of boiling water. I also have a teething son who is breastfeeding. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was cooking, and I took a pot of boiling water to the sink to drain. My pot holder slipped, and the boiling water spilled all over my breasts. Second degree boob burns are bad, but losing half a nipple to potato salad is worse. FML
Today, while cooking, I managed to burn my finger. I quickly turned the tap on and ran my finger under cold water, but apparently someone had just used the hot tap, because boiling water flooded out onto my nicely scalded finger. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML
Today, I had to explain to my husband that while trying to figure out how to make coffee on our stupid new machine, I was in fact nude, so when I finally got it to work and steam came hissing out of the nozzle, I got first degree burn on my nipple. FML
Today, I accepted I can't cook at all. Why? I burned myself cooking popcorn in a microwave oven. I accidentally burst the package open and a scorching kernel flew into my bra. FML
Today, I burned myself while cooking, so I asked my mom to get the burn cream while I waited in the kitchen. While I was waiting, I absentmindedly set my hand on the hot stove, earning myself a second burn. FML
Today, while grabbing a husk of corn out of the boiling hot pot, I splashed hot water on my neck, dropped the corn on my injured toe, and cut myself on the counters, all while my family laughed at my pain. FML
Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML
Today, I made a cup of tea at work. Whilst talking to a workmate, I took a sip of the tea, which I had forgotten was boiling hot, and laughed at the same time, causing it to come out of my nose. I have blistered my whole mouth and even burnt my nostrils. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
PistachioNut94 0
were you naked?
blacklikemyheart 0
Its a shame people don't have two nipples...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (284)
cerebellum_fml 0
Thats so Hawt
Superawesomestev 0
seriously, use the other one? yep, just shut off milk production in the burned boob. duh
whatwasthatnoise 0
i'm confused as to why you need to lean over the stove to preheat the oven? on my cooker the oven is at the front and i cant think of any situation where i would need to lean over the stove to turn the oven on
rwarlol 0
yea, the way the op describe it the layout seems pretty bad.
Spiral_Fairy 0
Sometimes the controls are on the back of the stove, where the timers and everything usually are. That's what it's like on my stove, there are no nknobs on the front. Very common in old stoves.
kissintherain44 0
do you cook naked...? im pretty sure thats a safety hazard
burnquist764 0
I'm really shocked that people are just assuming she was naked. Water can very easily burn you through your clothes. also, it doesn't matter if she has 2 nipples, she still has a teething kid. Her other nipple will probably suffer too. FYL, OP.
ohmygoodnex 0
this is why you have TWO breasts. and this is also why you don't cook with your shirt off.
nevele11 0
Hangie boobs!
sweetspicegirl 0
OHH that sucks. YDI though you should be watching where your boobs are. use one of those pumping things to get milk out of that breast
Rakshasa23 0
Isn't that why you have two???? lol
leos1991 0
u got to nipples duhhh
megthegreat 2
learn how to spell...it's "two"