Miscellaneous: Today, I walked in on my roommate trying to smoke a Mars bar....

holyshart 5 June 2012, 09:03 United States

Today, I walked in on my roommate trying to smoke a Mars bar. FML

161 comments

Collection

Halloween

A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.

Same thing different taste

KindaLooksLikeCocaine 23 September 2015, 23:56 San Francisco, United States

Today, I walked in on my drunk roommate grinding up stale marshmallows and attempting to snort them. FML

54 comments

funnymanjoe 14 September 2011, 11:06 United States

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML

285 comments

curlyisnogood 10 January 2011, 00:19

Today, I walked in on my roommate flat-ironing his pubic hair. FML

147 comments

GonnaLockUpMySpices 30 October 2015, 01:34 San Francisco, United States

Today, my roommate broke into my spice cabinet so he could get high off of my nutmeg. FML

83 comments

scotto 23 February 2009, 01:21 United States

Today, I kissed my girlfriend and she tasted like a cigarette. I don't smoke. She doesn't smoke. My roommate does. FML

46 comments

meh beard This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff Bowmanville, Canada

I'm awake

Today, my roommate thought it was a good idea to set my beard on fire to wake me up. FML

62 comments

Anonymous This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff United States

You hypocrite

Today, my mother lectured me about going to the bar too often. She did this while rolling a joint. FML

68 comments

mario 3 March 2019, 04:00 Corvallis, United States

Today, my roommate ran out of filter tips so he cut up my chemistry note cards for his joints. FML

16 comments

Andy 18 November 2008, 21:13 United Kingdom

Today, I was having a smoke out on the balcony of my apartment. When I was walking back into the house, I walked straight into the large glass sliding door, loudly whacking it with my forehead, subsequently waking up my 2 other flatmates at 2.30am. FML

41 comments

wah wah "you raised him" 22 April 2014, 18:59 San Francisco, United States

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML

96 comments

garebear13 4

5 June 2012, 16:35

They're outta this world! Okay...I'm done...

Aug1508 9

5 June 2012, 16:36

I guess your room mate was trying to get sugar high. I don't think they understand that concept lol.

Add a comment · Reply to

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Comments (161)

Schiffy 18

5 June 2012, 22:47

The fact that you knew it was a Mars bar means one of three things: 1. You can easily identify one. 2. Your roommate told you what it was (similar to comment #104, I guess). 3. The wrapper was still on the candy bar while he was trying to smoke it.