Today, I visited my gynecologist. As she had her fingers inside me she decided that was the perfect time to say, "I absolutely love your socks!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML
Today, I was over at my boyfriend's house. One thing led to another and we were just getting to the good parts when his mom walked in. After a long, awkward pause, she said, "I like your socks" and walked out. She's a teacher at my high school. I have to see her every day. FML
Today, I went to the gynecologist. As she was checking me out, she said, "Wow. So you must get wet a lot." It took me several minutes to realize she was talking about my job bathing dogs. FML
Today, I went to the gynecologist. In the waiting room they had decorative words that spelled out "Relax" and "Enjoy". FML
Today, after finally breaking up with my controlling girlfriend, she took a shit in my socks. FML
Today, my doctor told me to take off my pants so she could do a checkup. When I took them off, she gasped. When I asked what was wrong, she said she was expecting something else. She thought I was a dude. FML
Today, I went to my gynecologist's for a check-up. After the doctor checked me I went to the bathroom. It turns out the walls aren't soundproofed, because I could hear the doctor telling his assistant, "God! How did she ever find a husband?" FML
Today, my friend and I went back to my house after a gym session. After I took my shoes and socks off in the foyer, I told her to wait while I brought some post-workout smoothies. I came back to find her sniffing my socks. She stared back at me for a bit, said, "Uh, catch ya later", and left with my socks. FML
Today, I was very tense as I sat in the chair for my gyno appointment, so the doctor repeatedly told me to relax, in order for her to do the routine exam. I then overcompensated and relaxed so much, I accidentally farted in her face. FML
Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML
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Top comments
waswashere 0
At least she didn't say "is it just me, or does it smell like fish in here?"
Xx_Nikky_xX 4
Nothing worse than awkward silence.
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Comments (142)
peterlikes 3
Maybe your ****** was just too beautiful for the gyno to stare at...
GothicAngel17 24
Vaginas always look gross.
manurwickd 1
Vaginas look sexy ;)
maskedman 9
People always say a penis looks gross, but I think they look uniform and balanced. Some vaginas do look good but most are just unsymmetrical and the lips are over the place. Vaginas do feel great though.
Cad6 24
^Wtf? I think my penis is gorgeous.
emogiggles 0
45 haha
maskedman 9
That's what I meant to put in. Penises aren't gross looking because they are symmetrical. People always say vaginas look better than penises but I think it's the opposite. People are just scared to say this because they don't want their sexuality questioned.
Cad6 24
^No no, I agree with you. I'm just surprised that anyone would think that a penis is gross. More importantly, why the **** are we having this conversation?
maskedman 9
I'm sorry. I took us to a very dark place. Let's go back to talking about nice socks.
Cad6 24
I have socks that light up and freak the crap out of people. Yay.
RedPillSucks 33
I had socks like that. Then people started questioning my sexuality. Maybe I should enter an FML
zeldafrettchen 1
There are such things as lesbians. Very scary thought, I know./Sarasm
omgcookeys 15
54, Spencer? Or are you Socko?
Roxibella 6
Spencer?
Xx_Nikky_xX 4
Nothing worse than awkward silence.
Feared 9
How about awkward noises? Like when you're in class, or in a meeting, and your stomach decides to make that dying whale noise.
ladyLALAA 29
43, omg I hate that I always think that people think you farted. So embarrassing haha!
ManUrLifeSucks 1
Hey this is random... But that pic u have is my iphone backround!!! We r like bros now!! =P
hawaiianfire 0
43 and 97 well that's easily fixed by eating.
omgcookeys 15
I enjoy socks as well.
ladyLALAA 29
I like the ones with lace at the top and the ones that are made to wear with bailey flats are awesome.
ladyLALAA 29
Ballet*
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
I
waswashere 0
At least she didn't say "is it just me, or does it smell like fish in here?"
sophsoph97 8
^^WIN^^
aussieaccents 7
106-Well no shit sherlock
ApologyKick 25
Or another unfortunate thing doc could have said: "Hmm it appears you have a cancerous tumor in your ******."
Da_Bauss435 8
Is it just me or am I the only one who noticed the OP is a guy because the name is GetHardOrGoHome
briienna14 0
Well it could be a gal if u think about it...
coffee_man900 16
OP is a girl. Guys don't go to a Gynecologist. Also, most guys don't tell you to "Get hard or go home." Usually, girls want you to get hard... Just sayin'... :)
deviable 9
She might have been trying to distract you from the situation. She failed, but it's the thought that counts.
jtthegr8 26
I wonder if some gynecologists take advantage of what they do and add a little "accidental" twirl ;)
PeteyPablo12308 20
Wow 17, you are a creepo... That's ******.
ProhibitionRose 14
Not to mention against the law. You're gross and creepy for even thinking about that.
xStaciexLynnx 15
You're also clearly a man because every woman knows what it's ACTUALLY like at the gyno.
kofeinisti 6
They see so many ******* (with varying degrees of nastiness) a day that they probably try to leave out as many "twirls" as possible
silent_bride 5
17: No, because that would a) sexualize a medical procedure, which is b) against the law, and c) has been done without consent... so really, your sick little fantasy qualifies as sexual assault. Enjoy your day.
TheMathMajor 26
My gynecologist does this too. She makes conversation throughout the exam. I think it's the most awkward thing ever.
GetHardOrGoHome 7
she was examining my boobs she commented on how good my perfume smelled...
cmcmluver 0
she probably just didn't have anything nice to say about ur ******, so next best thing? your socks!!!!!
lifesucks283 1
who gives a shit? at least you have nice socks.
ladyLALAA 29
I personally like the socks with the lace at the top best.
Palirose 22
Well, it's better than having her tell you there's something wrong with your ******.
dumaz 2
They're just trying to make it less awkward
missamerica95 0
I don't see the "FML" in this FML.
reenkaur 7
neither do i :|