Today, I tried to rid my son of his pacifier. He still uses it to sleep. My son is 20 years old. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Bittie
Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML
Today, it's 3:42 a.m. and my son is crying because I won't let him play with his dirty diaper. FML
Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML
Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML
Today, my son turned 18. He now calls me by my first name instead of "dad" and refuses to stop. FML
Today, I saw my two-year-old son trying to floss his teeth. He was using an earthworm. FML
Today, I finally convinced my son to use the potty. Later, he saw a show on TV about a toilet monster. Now he's too scared to even step foot into the bathroom. Here's to another few months of diaper changes. FML
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML
Kinda weird
Today, my son is incapable of sleeping alone because my husband keeps co-sleeping with him, stating, "He's going to be a kid for only a little while." The same guy who forced me to stop co-sleeping with the same kid because, "Kids need to be independent." The hypocrisy. FML
Top comments
ohhoho 2
You failed as a parent...
startafire 0
There are worse things for your son to be sucking on before he sleeps.
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Comments (179)
littlemissxx 0
his teeth must be horribly crooked. and FHL, not yours.
saki84 0
did you potty train him yet?
DAN7IEL 2
LMAO ur son is freaky.... bwahahaha
Selsa_Squirrel 0
He's technically an adult, your chance is over. Now you can only help if he asks. If he doesn't ask, it's not your business. you can offer to help, but that is all.
luckshotpro 12
ydi for letting him keep it for this long
Sanamach10 0
i used to bite my mom because i bit the pacifier so mine got chucked out the window when i was young. now i have vampire teeth cuz i bit things my whole life.
breenarae25 0
fake? idk if it's just me, but 20 years old is WAYYY to old fer a pacifier
califormula 0
His teeth must be all ****** up
ablake 0
probably still have to change his diapers and read him a night night story
apv12 0
I don't want to be mean but that is just sad for a 20 year old to use a pacifier