Today, I treated my boyfriend to an expensive dinner using the last of my paycheck. I had to excuse myself to the bathroom a few minutes in. I came back to find my plate empty. His excuse was, "I didn't want the food to get cold." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my girlfriend of a year out on a date, a nice fancy dinner and a movie. After dinner, I said that I was feeling sick and just wanted to go home. I didn't have the heart to tell her that dinner was so expensive that I didn't have money for the movie. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. After dessert, he went to the bathroom so I quickly called the waiter over and paid the bill, thinking it was a nice gesture. When he returned, he broke up with me for "emasculating" him. FML
Today, I went to dinner with an amazing guy. At the end he said he had to go to the washroom. 15 min later he was still MIA, so I figured he'd ditched me with the bill. I paid and left. 10 min later he texted me, asking where I was. Turns out he hadn't ditched me. He was having "stomach issues." FML
Today, I took my boyfriend out to dinner to an expensive restaurant. He overate, and now I have to nurse him through food poisoning. FML
Today, my boyfriend's dad said he'd given my boyfriend £100 to take me out for a meal last night and he hoped I'd enjoyed it. Last night my boyfriend and I went to Pizza Hut, shared a pizza and split the bill. Turns out my boyfriend had simply pocketed the money without telling anyone. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to pick up a few things from the store for him while he was at work. After picking up everything he asked for, I wasn't left with much money so I used $50 from my account. When he got home he then grumbled about me spending all of "his" money. FML
Today, my boyfriend stood me up. At dinner with his parents. FML
Today, I went on a dinner date with the guy I like. He ate all his food then started eating off my plate, going on to eat over half of my food. When the bill came, he made me pay for it. FML
Today, I stole a bite of my boyfriend's hamburger. He threw a fit, saying I took too big a bite and I had to replace it with a new, more expensive one. Afterwards, he said how lucky I was he didn't break up with me then and there. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
RebekahBrooke 9
wow. your boyfriend sucks.
hott15 0
Walk out and leave him stranded with the bill. Then when he freaks out about it say "Oh sorry I didn't want the car to get cold."
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Comments (197)
trollsemen 8
Get revenge and don't cook for him ever again.
WeAreAHurricane 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
The first problem was the fact that you treated Him to an expensive dinner...
Shrike 24
what is this, the 1950's? shut your fat ass up, you dickless sexist. go play with your Barbies in your mom's basement
WeAreAHurricane 14
The boyfriend sounds pretty inconsiderate so she should know that and not buy him dinner. And I don't see your need to insult someone over the Internet but if that floats your boat then go ahead
Shrike 24
stick a **** in it, 20. piss poor comeback from a piss poor piece of trolling sexist trash. say that five times fast then stop commenting for your own sake
urdirtyolduncle 15
Oh, Shrike, you're so hostile!!
chell1894 13
Can you say selfish
xoconnie 8
fail
hott15 0
Walk out and leave him stranded with the bill. Then when he freaks out about it say "Oh sorry I didn't want the car to get cold."
shannonreneee 11
How long were you in that toilet for!
hellokittay 5
I don't see anything wrong with a girl buying dinner for her and her boyfriend a few times. The boyfriend probably pays for her stuff all the time!
ZielZone 4
Women's lib. They're as good as men are, they can treat now and then. Men have just as many bills as women, yet they expect us to pay for everything... LoL. STFU
lllilll 4
Why does 2 have so many downvotes? The poster is right. If the boyfriend is such an asshole that he does things like this, she should've known earlier and not treat him. It has nothing to do with being sexist.
nellienicole 1
What's wrong with treating your boyfriend to an expensive dinner? I never expect mine to pay every time. I'm happy to pay for our meals because I care about him. I look forward to treating him to things like birthday dinners and whatnot..am I the only one here..haha
MrsPegg 45
LOL. I think the whole point is that he ate her food, with a small point being that she used what was left of her money to take him to dinner. Yes, it was fuc*** up he ate her food and yea, it sucks she used all of her paycheck to feed BOTH of them, but, has anyone else noticed the key word in OP's FML "... a few minutes in..."? She had to take a shit or something. I would've sent him a text or something apologizing for why I was taking so long... or maybe I'm the only one who takes their phone to the shitter. Haha!
Zaffro 8
I think out of this I find two things, one the OP's boyfriend is a glutton and highly inconsiderate with no manners. Two shrike is a left wing, pedantic, argumentative idiot who has nothing better to do than make stupid comments without summing up all the possibilities.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Shrike made a good point #98.
RetardedChipmunk 7
You guys don't understand. Shrike was trying to say that a woman treating a man to dinner is not a problem. Women make just as much if not more money than their male counterparts, so they can afford to treat a man to things. Think before you comment.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
92, That portion of the story was referring to the time passed since they arrived, or started eating, not the time it took OP to come out of the bathroom. And yes, there's nothing more romantic than receiving a text from your ******** girlfriend while you're eating.
docscientist 10
Wtf is wrong with every last one of you?
Shrike 24
105 - Thanks, I thought the point was obvious but some of these people clearly think subtlety means hitting someone in the face with a brick. 98 - You're a moron. What the hell has left or right wing politics got to do with attacking sexism?! Get back under your bridge, troll.
systems7 2
I agree with Shrike
nerobluerose 10
Yes but considering he explained himself pretty well, then you Internet assaulted him for no reason other than to feel cool. You are the idiot. She was kind for buying the meal. He was a douchebag for eating hers. She shouldn't have taken him out to eat if he's that much of an ass. Make him pay if he ate it all.
Dan_the_Man_dan_ 1
Well obviously he was hungry, and she didn't buy him enough food!
slushpup9696 12
You should always treat God with respect. Get it? Because it said Him and not him, and biblically when you refer to - ah **** it, nevermind.
tmmundy 17
155..."His...sorry to correct you. I usually never correct comments.
chiddy_bang71 0
29, stop being sexist. You should have said **** or mariglade.
MrsPegg 45
#110: I still think she was gone too long. Unless OP's boyfriend is a giant who can eat a Burger in one bite (metaphorically speaking), he had more than enough time to consume her meal. . . now as for the ******** text, I guess I'm more light-hearted because I thought that shit was funny. And it's not like she has to say "hey, tkn a shit. BRB". She could've said "lines long. only one toilet working" or something! LOL
ezekielisbeast 0
True.
GabbyCharityM 0
Should have just stayed at home & made him a sandwich..
NeonBluee 8
How do you know OP isn't a gay guy?
DrIDGAF 7
Ham and cheese sandwich>Caviar
trollsemen 8
Never cook for him again then, or never eat what he cooks,
ProhibitionRose 14
I'm assuming she took him out to eat.
MissBunnyWillEat 11
Lay off the crack pipe, 4.
rexgar2000 10
why not? I mess with my wife's all the time
echogekko 7
F for effort
jayfishing 0
C for cold
ThreeSheetsGone 12
A for asshole
fashionistaGirll 0
Make him pay for the dinner!!
Saltime 0
61 - Make your own comment and say that, instead of making it a reply to someone else's.
lilwaynerockz_fml 12
D for dumbasses
Bravo11 14
C for Combo Breaker.
airforce987 20
129 needs to relearn the definition of combo-breaker.
Bravo11 14
I know what a combo breaker is. Perhaps you should learn what a troll is.
Notimetobleed 14
Beer, Metal, Trolls and Vomit!
RebekahBrooke 9
wow. your boyfriend sucks.
Death_From_Above 0
Nah... He was just being nice. Food ain't good cold!
RebekahBrooke 9
pizza is. :3
ChecoJosuel 6
Haha nah pizza is better warm. Ever got the roof of your mouth burned ugh I dislike that.
RebekahBrooke 9
ughhh yes. it hurts. but I love cold pizza!
jayfishing 0
cold pizza with cheese, and any vegetables on it ie onions, peppers etc are fine as long as its eaten within 24hrs. But anything with meat on it ie beef, and certain fish, can cause you to be ill. Its the bacteria that multiples and grows quickly on the pizza once it starts cooling off that can cause diarrhea and tummy upsets. This does not effect everyone, so its a risk you take.
MissBunnyWillEat 11
Grrrrr... This wasn't meant for here. Dammit.
ThreeSheetsGone 12
I cook pizza with the intention of putting it in the fridge to get cold. Then drizzle some ranch and Parmesan cheese on it and we're good to go!
jayfishing 0
Ever tried it with peanut butter
ThreeSheetsGone 12
Are you kidding? I smoked a shitload of weed when I was younger. Of course I tried it with peanut butter!
GorillaFist 0
You are very attractive hahaha
allinicolesmh 0
Why thank you all for sharing with Fml your pizza fetishes...
StoryOfTheYear 15
^^^^ No kidding, I'm glad I'm content to just order Dominoes and get a normal Pepperoni and Sausage.
ThreeSheetsGone 12
Did you not read the second sentence? Weed makes shitty music sound good, and makes good food taste even better.
Hunnnttteeeerrr 0
Hay now, almost all food is gross cold (outher then pizza).
saIty 17
Was it those restaurants with the small portion foods that goes for tons? If so you're better off eating at places such as Panera Bread.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
8, sometimes it's about the quality of the food. I'm sure you can get an enormous amount of food at McDonald's or your local discount foods store, but it won't hold a candle to some of that exceptional deliciousness that goes for tons.
zowieandzander77 1
Panera bread is not where you go on a date...
saIty 17
But it's not even enough to fill someone up, and they'll charge a Donald Trump amount for it. Doesn't seem like a very swell deal.
SteelCladAngel 0
The point of super expensive restaurants with delicious food is to taste and enjoy top of the line foods, not stuff yourself like a pig... You want good prices and fill you up food go to a local mom n pops diner....
ShroomsOnAcid 17
81 is right, and also it does fill some people up, depending on how much they usually eat and what they're having. For example, I usually cannot finish a meal at panera bread or McDonald's without feeling like my stomach will explode, mainly because of the sheer volume of the food. On the other hand, even the largest fries will not fill me up the way a way smaller looking portion of salmon will. Another trade off is that what the food won't cost you in money, it will cost you in health. You think you're saving some dough by getting the most volume/calories per dollar, but that strategy only works to your benefit if you've barely got enough money to afford a meal, and it might as well be your last. There's a reason the poorest people in America are also the fattest.
zowieandzander77 1
Exactly! For me a nice dinner is about perfectly cooked fresh amazing ingredients not the dollar menu. If you took the time to enjoy your food you might be surprised that a smaller portion is actually enough food. I'm sorry but no one needs to eat 2 hamburger parties covered in special sauce and pound of greasy fries.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
I'm glad to see more people realizing that, 99. Many assume that you can't eat sensibly and love food at the same time. But to me, it means enjoying and savoring every bite, not swallowing up my whole meal the way I would a pill. Sometimes I wonder if Shaggy and Skooby really love those giant sandwiches so much if they just shoot them straight down their throat without taking the time to actually taste them.
JRFaceless 8
Why would you date someone so inconsiderate
lena6310 0
Jerk
FuttBuck 0
Easy on the wings brah.
lena6310 0
?
twofirstnames 12
At least the food wasn't wasted...