Today, I took off the training wheels of my niece's bike. I tried to show her how to ride it, but she told me to get off because I needed a "fat girl's bike." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was teaching my daughter how to ride a bike with no training wheels. After comforting her and assuring her that she'd be fine, I gave her a big push. She fell forward over the handlebars and scraped her chin on the front wheel. FML
Today, I tried to show my little cousin how to ride a bike without training wheels. Not only did I crash into a bush, but the handlebars hit me in the nuts, and I ended up rolling around like a Labrador in shit in front of the neighbors. FML
Today, I assembled my kid’s birthday bike without reading the instructions. I proudly presented it, only for him to sit on it and immediately realize the handlebars were on backwards. The training wheels were also uneven, so it leaned like a sinking ship. My kid said, “It’s OK Dad, it's not your fault,” which hurt more than if he’d laughed. FML
Today, my wife threatened to leave me for "bodyshaming" our daughter by giving her a bicycle for her birthday. I bought her a bike because she's been asking for one for months. FML
Today, the girl who likes me incredibly much asked me if she could come for a ride with me on my motorcycle. Normally this isn't a problem as I take lots of people out for rides for fun, but this time I had no choice but to tell her she couldn't because she's just too heavy for it. FML
Today, my sister stole my bike and gave it to her boyfriend. When I told my parents, they said it was fine, because I wasn't using it anyway. The reason I wasn't using it was because it needed a new tire, and I was saving up for one. FML
Today, the girl of my dreams asked me if I wanted to go biking with her. "Just the two of us," she said. I had to turn her down because I'm 17 years old and never learned how to ride a bike. FML
Today, I argued with my mom that I deserved enough independence to ride my bike to school. Halfway there, I realized I was so out of shape that I had to call her for a ride. FML
Today, my niece offered me a slice of cake. After I refused, she asked, "Why not? Aren't fat people always hungry?" FML
Today, I was showing my 6-year-old son how easy and safe it is to ride a bike. I didn't notice a pebble, bust up my leg, and my son is now terrified of bicycles. FML
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Top comments
alexup24 13
Or an exercise bike.
indistructo 3
kids these days...
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Comments (101)
linkinpark98 24
Lmao, a "fat girl's" bike? Wouldn't that be one of those stationary exercise bikes? Oh well. Don't worry OP. I'm sure you look just fine. :) Maybe because of the fact that she's a child, she might think all adults are bigger.
PurpleCabbage 1
Tell her you'd rather ride a fat girls bike than an ugly baby bike. Then kick the bike over.. Make her cry >:D o_o uhh, or, you know, you could still teach her but accidentally let go of the handle bars when she's near a street. Why am I do violent?! D: just don't teach her, FYL OP.
CRC_101 31
How old is your niece? If she's just now taking off her training wheels, I would assume she's young. She's probably not using an adult-sized bike. If that's the case, there's no reason to sulk. Of course you'll look "fat" on a child's bike; in that sense, you deserve it. Still, no need to take the comment to heart. Kids say rude things a lot. It doesn't make them right. I agree with some of the above though; it sounds like she could use more discipline. Good opportunity to nag your brother or sister! x)
djxerxes9000 18
She's just calling it as she sees it
LadyMacabre 6
I' d just leave her there without training wheels.. and with no way home... Lol.
Weezay 5
Funny, aren't you a little kid too? xD
tutti77 3
They speak what is on thier mind..
braheem 5
hahahaha sweet kid!
mfayem 15
I see a diet in your future
Dustin_Pedobear 9
So I read in some pretentious asswipe's bio not to confuse you for a nun. What's all that about?