Today, I took off the training wheels of my niece's bike. I tried to show her how to ride it, but she told me to get off because I needed a "fat girl's bike." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was teaching my daughter how to ride a bike with no training wheels. After comforting her and assuring her that she'd be fine, I gave her a big push. She fell forward over the handlebars and scraped her chin on the front wheel. FML
Teaching moment
Today, I tried to show my little cousin how to ride a bike without training wheels. Not only did I crash into a bush, but the handlebars hit me in the nuts, and I ended up rolling around like a Labrador in shit in front of the neighbors. FML
I want to ride my bicycle
Today, I assembled my kid’s birthday bike without reading the instructions. I proudly presented it, only for him to sit on it and immediately realize the handlebars were on backwards. The training wheels were also uneven, so it leaned like a sinking ship. My kid said, “It’s OK Dad, it's not your fault,” which hurt more than if he’d laughed. FML
It's political correctness gone mad!
Today, my wife threatened to leave me for "bodyshaming" our daughter by giving her a bicycle for her birthday. I bought her a bike because she's been asking for one for months. FML
Today, the girl who likes me incredibly much asked me if she could come for a ride with me on my motorcycle. Normally this isn't a problem as I take lots of people out for rides for fun, but this time I had no choice but to tell her she couldn't because she's just too heavy for it. FML
Property is theft
Today, my sister stole my bike and gave it to her boyfriend. When I told my parents, they said it was fine, because I wasn't using it anyway. The reason I wasn't using it was because it needed a new tire, and I was saving up for one. FML
Today, the girl of my dreams asked me if I wanted to go biking with her. "Just the two of us," she said. I had to turn her down because I'm 17 years old and never learned how to ride a bike. FML
I want to ride my bicycle, I want to ride my bike
Today, I argued with my mom that I deserved enough independence to ride my bike to school. Halfway there, I realized I was so out of shape that I had to call her for a ride. FML
Today, my niece offered me a slice of cake. After I refused, she asked, "Why not? Aren't fat people always hungry?" FML
Today, I was showing my 6-year-old son how easy and safe it is to ride a bike. I didn't notice a pebble, bust up my leg, and my son is now terrified of bicycles. FML
Top comments
alexup24 13
Or an exercise bike.
indistructo 3
kids these days...
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Comments (101)
worldclassrager 41
Now that's just mean...it's sort of a YDI and FYL but (Doc Bastard is going to hate me for saying this)...kids say the darnest things...I vote FYL...
itsharkley 8
U are damn creepy with that pic and and the last talk about a penis cutting fml
Cad6 24
#53 - And you're a ******* racist.
hateevryone 15
She's mean but funny at the same time.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Cad, I don't think he was being racist. Just look at Noor's profile pic. The mustache and face doodling and the comment on the latest Penis-almost-got-cut FML. Kind of creepy.
bizarre_ftw 22
Did she fall due to lack of expert direction? Also, side note, tell her weight is genetic (and if her mum's a stick say it skips a generation on her side, if your mum's a stick say I simply skips a generation, etc...)
Cad6 24
Oh. I can't see people's profile pictures for some reason, but last time her profile pic was a picture of her...I think. BUT, he could have been racist towards people with doodled mustaches.
almost34 4
A
zumiez069 5
This is why i hate kids......… btw i really dont care if u dislike
KiddNYC1O 22
Too honest for you?
LiLKuttie 0
Atleast she is honest? :S