Today, I told my husband that I wanted him to stay sober during the week. He responded by saying he wanted me to be a supermodel during the week. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I confessed to my husband that after having my eating disorder under control the last two years, I've relapsed the last three months. He responded by telling me to keep it up, because he wants to have the hottest wife out of all his friends. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I was going to start controlling my drinking and he told me pretty much that he didn’t think I could do it. FML
Today, after I was surprised by my husband announcing he was coming off the drink and going to the gym to get in shape, I found out that I've been such a fool, as it turns out the pre-workout shakes he kept making contained about 5 shots of vodka, so he could drink at home without me moaning. FML
Today, during our wedding, my new husband said that he’d divorce me if I “let myself go.” Later, he couldn’t understand why I'd got upset and told me, “Why are you so worked up for? If you don’t want that to happen, just eat healthy and exercise daily, it's not that hard.” FML
Today, my fitness trainer husband told me that if I could not make the commitment to stay thin, he could not make the commitment to stay with me. FML
Today, while trying to have a serious conversation with my husband about his drug use over text, he came home. Drunk. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me grief about my drinking. This would be fine, if he were sober. FML
Today, my husband has been super happy for the last 11 weeks, as he's been able to tell me what to do, when to do it and how to do it. Now I'm allowed to start work again, he's gone back to being super shitty. FML
Today, I showed my boyfriend a picture of me in what I thought was a sexy skintight dress. He responded by saying "it's ok, I went through a pudgy stage too". The picture was from Saturday night. FML
Today, my wife told me alcohol gives me "increased confidence without increased ability." FML
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Top comments
gntfmlingnow 12
If he wasn't sober, you'd look like a supermodel anyways
mackenzie2323 5
So he wants you to look sickly and starved?
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Comments (123)
saIty 17
I don't see why not. Get a complete makeover to look like Jessica Alba.
LiveLaughFML 10
if he's drunk, you'll look like a supermodel to him. nobody is ugly after 2:00 A.M. ;-)
fthislyfe 22
So he only drinks so that you look like a supermodel?
pitchblease 2
^ Ding ding ding! Johnny! We have a winner!
seppi24 1
get a complete character makeover:)
fanceh 10
And then you responded by walking out the door, right?
ikickgingers 15
Beer goggles don't work for everyone. Some people are still ugly.
Keyman1212 14
In my opinion, beer goggles don't exist. It's just that when you're drunk you're slightly more frisky, okay a lot more frisky for me, and you'll find less attractive individuals more attractive because you can score with them. Sounds ****** up, because it is.
5t3ff1k4h 47
1 - Because Jessica Alba is a supermodel. Try a makeover like Heidi Klum.
scrapmetal58 9
OP get a makeover to look like me ;)
yellowman57 13
YES!!!
gntfmlingnow 12
If he wasn't sober, you'd look like a supermodel anyways
LifeOnBlast19 9
Touché!
ntherewas1 11
But it's not like OP was asking for the moon...FYL!
LouisianaBob 9
Or you could just pretend you were on a cat walk in the house and give him very dry and sexual poses.
mackenzie2323 5
So he wants you to look sickly and starved?
Beebow_fml 5
You're thinking anorexic. He means supermodel as in beautiful person.
Madiluvsyuh98 2
No. Supermodels are anorexic and usually ugly. Check out americas next top model.
dtbomb 3
Those are not supermodels. They are just regular ugly models.
Beebow_fml 5
The OP's husband obviously implies supermodel, as in beautiful woman, not anorexic freak.
ElGranOrgo 0
Adrianna Lima is a supermodel and not anorexic nor ugly
TheresNoEffingwa 7
I'm a model, I'm 5'6 , and I'm 140 pounds. I have Wendy's at LEAST once a week. FAR from anorexic.
SadinSherman 16
But isn't it different for girl and guy models?
nerdsgetmehot 23
#33 Adriana Lima is pretty darn skinny. Maybe she's not anorexic, but it's certain that she probably has to work out an insane amount and restrict her eating quite a bit.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
63 She honestly looks just fine to me. You don't know how her body works after all. Still, working out insanely and restrictive diets are often prerequisites for certain types of models. But there's no reason to call them ugly and anorexic with them already being told they're not good enough on a regular enough basis for them to get to that point in the first place. Respect your fellow human beings.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#70 Uh...If you might notice, I wasn't the one who called Adriana Lima ugly or anorexic. All I said is that there is a chance that she might eat a bit less and work out a bit more than a "normal" person. I also never said she was too skinny, just that she's quite thin. I wasn't dissing her. I do respect my fellow human beings.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
That part wasn't directed at you. Just the first 3 sentences are. The parts of my comment addressing things you didn't say are in response to those who did say them. It's just hard to reply to everyone individually on the app.
imjessicababy 0
You guys are fighting over something really stupid.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Hey, I'm not fighting over anything. I was just stating my opinion.
perdix 31
In other words, he needs the Beer Goggles to find you attractive. It will be cheaper and easier to keep him liquored up than to do the diet and exercise and beauty treatments and plastic surgery to not look like a troll.
whited666 0
So he does carexD just kidding, he's kinda a douche
Blueglasscup 18
That reminds me of that beer commercial where the more the guy drinks the hotter the girl at the bar gets.
leadman1989 16
This reminds me of that Trojan commercial where all the dudes were pigs, sadly.
Prolusive 5
That reminds me of last Saturday night ;)
MD_DILF 4
Try getting drunk with him, maybe he will look better and uour problem will be solved!
DasHaas 9
Sounds like you married an a-hole.
stupidisntcute 0
Not really!
TheLastChild 8
What a charming fellow
leadman1989 16
I LOVE THAT SONG!!! "this charming fellow" actually ^-^
leadman1989 16
This charming man - I failed SO hard. It's by the smiths give it a listen. It is awesome.
ikickgingers 15
"It's gruesome that someone so handsome should care." - is my favorite lyric from that song. True story.
Senior29 8
tell him dat if u cud be a supermodel, u wudnt even luk at him
ICaughtFire 4
I lost twelve brain cells reading that comment...