Today, I thought it would be a good idea to declare my love to the girl I have a crush on. I guess I shouldn't have gone and kissed her without warning, because now my face is covered with slap marks, and I had to explain myself at the police station for sexual harassement. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a girl and I were flirting and it was going well. Feeling bold, I asked what she would do if I kissed her. She smiled flirtatiously and said "Why don't you try it and find out?" I went in for a kiss, and she slapped me. FML
Today, I went to the mall with my girlfriend to buy some new clothes, and I turned around to give her a quick kiss. My lips were half-way to "her" face when I saw instead the face of another lady. She slapped me. My girlfriend was standing next to me, very pissed off. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML
Today, I was in school when I spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her, I broke her nose. FML
Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML
Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML
Today, my crush took me to a park and told me he loved me. We sat on an old bench and were just about to kiss when I screamed. I now have a huge splinter in my arse and he can't stop laughing. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, on the advice of several friends, I tried to de-escalate a stupid argument with my fiancée by kissing her. She slapped me senseless and whooped my ass up and down the house until I escaped to the car. FML
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Top comments
dannyydanny 0
are you ******* retarded ....
mk58 31
You're supposed to declare your love BEFORE trying to kiss her rather than declaring your love BY kissing her. Now she's going to think you're a creep.
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Comments (267)
randomsweety 0
Wat is wrong with u!
kc1997kc 9
This is reality not some romantic movie! I would have slapped you too. Although the sexual harassment thing is a bit overboard. Next time use your words.
HellfireRogue 7
some guy did that to me, too i hated it but i just pulled him off and said "i'm sorry, but i'm not into you like that." the slapping and charge? not necessary. she's a bitch. ya dodged a bullet, there.
Vaesive 0
Op, you're a dumbass
Xmarshall16X 5
Ehh sorry bro, you've been watching A LOT of movies. FYL though, it wouldv'e been really romantic if she liked you. I admire your confidence as well as I NEVER could have done this...
terranada 3
not everything in anime works in real life...
WishLine 6
If only it worked out like it does in movies. I feel for the OP - that could have been breathtakingly sweet, but I can understand why it could also be construed as a major invasion of privacy. That's why it helps to really know the girl xD Sexual assault though? What a load of bollocks.
sblhaine 0
the bitch over reacted. get over her. not worth it
mizzflory 5
At least now he knows she likes it rough haha
thechodog 0
Shouldn't have initiated the kiss. Huge no-no.