Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML
Today, I hit a new low when I caught myself eating the chocolates that were meant to be part of my boyfriend's Christmas presents. FML
Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML
Today, I caught my mom eating cat biscuits. We don't have a cat. FML
Today, I saw my cat licking something on the side of the road and went to check what it was. It was someone's old cigarette. I now know why she wants to be let out so often: She's addicted to nicotine. FML
Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML
Today, I helped myself to some homemade biscuits that had been left in the kitchen. I thought they looked a little odd, but they tasted pretty good. I found out later they were homemade dog treats. FML
Today, my roommate left a bomb looking package of cookies on the kitchen counter. My sweet tooth got the best of me and I made that split second decision of, "Oh, I'll just have one." Halfway through it, I noticed the fine print, "For dogs" on the package. FML
Today, I started my new health kick with granola for breakfast, salad for lunch, and hitting the gym after work. I was so proud of myself, until I couldn’t take it anymore and binged at McDonald’s. My health kick lasted 11 hours. FML
Today, I decided to quit smoking. During my lunch break, I tried to ash the KitKat bar that was in my hand after I took a bite. FML
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Top comments
ShananaginsLOL 13
I love the way you worded that.
TheLadyOpal 30
Oh, now THIS is an FML I'd like to see a comic for.
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Comments (197)
Micayla 12
What a cat-astrophy! Lol....... Sorry had to say it!
hemz_fml 13
Finally an FML that isn't the same as all the other ones.
landon_loe11 16
I'm a fan of whisker biscuits too.
hessel 13
you have cat to be kitten me right meow
phoneYuNOlisten 16
You are so good with puns, I'm just scratching the surface.
imyy 20
Cat-egorically speaking, these puns are very a-mew-sing!
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
dude this is the most story book sounding fml ever! so much suspense! and the way its set up... brilliant!
subwaysurfers 13
I seriously thought I was reading six billion secrets when I read this FML.
CallMeWindSock 24
My mind while reading this: oh no, she's smoking, oh wait, is it just gum? It's just gu- what the ****.
gotaplanstan 28
Meow can someone explain what #1 was talking about. I don't knit it.
TheLadyOpal 30
Oh, now THIS is an FML I'd like to see a comic for.
lolfood 24
I agree so much.
LeafsGuy92 10
At first, I thought to myself.. Smoking... lol, whatever, no big deal. Then Iams like.. That's ******.
Uramonkey 11
Would have been more of an FML if they started smoking again. It's not like eating cat food will turn you into a cat. Plus there are no giveaways like smokers breath/clothes but how should I know. I don't eat cat food! :p
tzoro37 9
...was I the only one who thought it was gonna be twinkies?
Iceman225 11
142:Bet then "iams" like? hehehehe? ok, sorry.
ZelmaSlayer 30
#144, you got me, smoking turned me into a cigarette!
ShananaginsLOL 13
I love the way you worded that.
airforce987 20
Best written FML evah!
Damian95 16
It was very suspenseful. I didn't see it coming.
Allennis44 16
We've hit the weird part of FML. I didn't even know there was one.
boycrazy30007 12
Are you that lady from my strange addiction
LittleJess23 15
I thought the exact same thing when I read this.
jessBeAqueen 13
gives a new meaning to crazy cat lady
BradTheBrony 19
More like a MEW meaning, eh?
ileenefudge 29
Lets not bring pokemon into this...
maniaccy 8
And this doesn't physically hurt you anywhere?
lemon_phat 11
Great observation, you deserve a medal.
SlapAndTickle 20
Pretty sure he/she was asking a legitimate question.
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
for real....idk why 5 is being thumbed down. he was basically saying op has no reason to complain...its not killing em.
neuroticallyyour_fml 17
It most certainly does. There's an episode of My Strange Addiction with a woman who had a history of eating cat food and treats and the medical expert told her that she was basically asking for cancer and that the "meat" used in pet foods is the leftover parts that aren't for human consumption.
miiajayne 6
Depending on op's location, I know the EU requires all cat and dog food to be suitable for human consumption, so no harm there.
Nekogami 14
It's a federal law that all animal / pet foods be safe for human consumption. Just FYI.
ajh557 22
I like to say I know how your feline but I don't
emeraldisle 30
*you're
robotiick7 23
49- and the asshole of the year is...
domking1315 20
Fml Rule #546: Grammer doesn't matter if your pun is good.
Jjan04 14
Grammar* haha just had to
Soloman212 28
Fair play, 98. There wasn't a pun involved.
FightMyLiger 19
If this pun is still considered good, then 'why did the chicken cross the road' must still be funny, too. It's not. ******* cat puns are dead people.
Soloman212 28
Woah, woah, 125! Let's just paws for a second and think this through.
ajh557 22
Why'd fightmyligar cross the road... He couldn't get his dick out of the chicken
ChibiChibi_fml 28
And it's Good! Point to the Puns.
FightMyLiger 19
#134 - I don't get it, but I salute your originality.
Soloman212 28
You went from hissing at cat puns to saluting a "why did the chicken cross the road" joke as original? Fur real, I don't get it.
whoracle_fml 12
Clever girl
FML_Whale 18
not feeling the clever.
JordanDempsey 20
I LOVE baby food :}
jamalamadingdong 18
I love lamp.....
mikelangele 15
Clever as in the way she worded it. Like really?!
FMLbutYDI 17
Nasty.
theofficialkumar 6
Micayla LOL
dallaschloe2 15
that's what the up vote is for, buddy.
Patch1313 8
Well cats are picky picky animals, even about their food. If you had to choose an animal's biscuits, better to choose the one that looks down on all the others!