Today, I started college after a night out. I'd got tipsy at the club and started dancing with a cute guy. He asked for my number. I didn't want to give it to him, so I gave him a rejection number. Guess who's the new professor for my bio class? And yes, he recognized me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML
Today, I began my job as an intern at a high school. I saw one of the students looked very familiar, and I couldn't remember from where. Then I figured it out, I had hooked up with him at a club last week. He's a junior in high school, I'm in my last year of college. FML
Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML
Today, I realized that I accidentally said my phone number wrong when I was giving it to a really smart, cute guy with all the same interests as me that I met at a bar last night. I'd had a few drinks and had gotten the middle three digits mixed up. FML
Today, I went to a club with a couple of my friends. I met a really cute guy and we were getting along pretty well. We eventually exchanged numbers. Later on I decided to call him and set up a date. The number he gave me was the Rejection Hotline number. FML
Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML
Today, a cute guy I recognized from one of my classes messaged me on a dating site. He wanted help with homework. FML
Today, I went to my first university party already a little drunk. I perched on the end of a table to cool off from the dancing and the whole table tipped over and dumped me onto the floor. I was promptly laughed out of the room. FML
Today, at my all-night senior party, I was talking to the blind girl who I haven't had classes with since 9th grade. I unthinkingly opened the conversation with "Nice to see you again." FML
Today, I started my new job. Only after I met my new boss did I realise I've met him before. He was at my friend's party last month, the only time in my life when I got so wasted that I danced on a table before puking on myself. He remembers me, too. FML
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Top comments
rhanana 0
Idea for using a rejection number and not having the guts to just say how you feel to his face :/
smiller0789 3
Rejection hotlines should be reserved for creepers and douchebags, at least give decent guys that you just aren't interested in a wrong number and not a you-suck-at-life number.
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Comments (221)
dirtyhose 0
lol jonni you are making yourself look like a dumbass by getting all butthurt over hearing the truth. Take some time off of your computer and evaluate yourself. Maybe you belong on neopets or something? But they may be a little harsh too so if that doesnt work i am sure that disney has a great website for people with the same brain capacity as yourself :)
TRACKGiRLJONNi 0
lol sorry your mistaking confidence with butthurt lady. let it gooo cuz this Kidd is out((:
dirtyhose 0
okay goodnight! have fun at school tomorrow, i hope youve learned something from this positive experience ;)
kaycoo 0
Yup cause you are a dumbass i said it ill say it again at least i have the guts to call you out on it thats the problem with todays youth noone calls em on thier bullshit
dirtyhose 0
lmaoooo omg thats the funniest thing ive ever read. Hahha omg if youre doing this all to be funny and make me laugh, kudos because its working! Bye darling.
kaycoo 0
Lmao over butthurt
unique_mamii 0
ydi for being a tease, AND you missed out on an easy A lol.
bent80 0
YDI. Maybe next time you won't be a stupid **** and can just tell the guy no?
IReadAlotOfFmls 0
Douche move, also you missed out on an easy A and maybe even some sex
bent80 0
In a hopeless bid for intelligence, he wasn't a mugger, you weren't attacked or threatened; he was a pickpocket.
BlargHonk 0
Wrong FML, my friend.
ImaginaryFoe 1
That's what makes the bid for intelligence hopeless. :P
bellus 0
128, Why are you so insecure? Put some clothes that fit. Yuck.