Today, I snuck out of work 2 hours early. As I was speeding away so I wouldn't be seen, I rear-ended my boss as he was leaving the lower parking lot for a late lunch. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sneaked off work early. As I was in the elevator on the way down to leave, it stopped at my boss's floor, and he got in. FML
Today, while I was backing out of the my work's parking lot, I hit my boss's truck. While he was in it. FML
Today, moments after leaving early, my boss emails me asking if I'm in the office. After an illegal U-turn, running a stop sign, parking in a visitor spot, and sneaking back to my desk, I find out she was locked out of the building but had since found her keys and let herself back in. FML
Today, I got to my underground parking garage at work and saw my boss pulling into a spot. I thought I would show him my reverse parking skills and decided to park beside him. As I was pulling in he opened his door to get out and I smashed into it, nearly running him over. FML
Today, I was on my way to work and someone cut me off. I then switched lanes and sped past the person as I flipped them off. What I didn't notice was that the person that cut me off was my boss. He's been shooting me dirty looks from across the room all morning. FML
Today, my boss left early, so I decided to take an extended break and run home. I found my wife in bed with my boss. I got fired for leaving work. FML
Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML
Today, I sneaked out of work early. I tripped over my own feet while walking up to my car. As I fell, I managed to hit the panic button on my car keys, setting off my car alarm while I lay flat on the ground in the parking lot. FML
Today, I got pissed and tried to storm out of work, only to get outside and realize I couldn't because I'd let my coworker borrow my car for lunch. FML
Today, my boss went out for a few hours. My coworkers saw this as an opportunity to take a 2 hour lunch without getting caught. I stayed at the office to answer the phone, while streaming videos which is a big no no. My boss came back early and caught me, they're all still taking lunch. FML
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Top comments
Shadic 0
What the hell is the point of these "I did something completely ******* stupid. Feel bad for me please?" types of FMLs? Seriously. You'll get no sympathy from me.
Killeritch 0
i kinda want to know why you thought driving quickly and irresponsibly would make you less likely to get spotted and/or caught. pro tip: if you're driving fast, it makes you more visible, not less. so ytdi.
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Comments (60)
CyclonePsycho 1
Sneaking out of work two hours early? Huh. I guess they do make stupid in that flavor.
icanfloat12 0
fail
satanicminnow1 1
I hope you get fired dipshit. I really wonder WTF is going on in people's heads that makes them think crap like this is ok. Seriously, WTF?
noshitsherlock 0
LEARN HOW TO DRIVE, DUMBASS. It's called "brakes"
charlton2142 5
Yes because that is the moral of the story.
crankyinthemorn 0
This reminds me of an old saying, "When you work late, no one notices, but if you try to leave work early you meet your boss in the parking lot." Your incident shows us how very true that saying really is. :)
myfriend_youfail 3
Oh, all the charges they could mention as reason for termination... Fraud (if you remained on the clock when you left). Vehicle damages. Leaving the workplace before the designated time. Failing to fulfill duties specified as an employee. Reckless driving on company property. Have fun trying to find a new job! :)
yoshiyakiryu 20
Why do people feel the need to post an FML that they themselves obviously caused? 'Today, I shot 10 people. I was caught. FML' Instead of asking for sympathy for your own stupidity, you should either learn to stop doing such stupid things or remove yourself from the gene pool.
lissn 0
I said that once and got flamed for it. Well said, anyway :P OP's a dick
danthemanfosho 0
YDI there are alot of honest people who need jobs not Jackasses like you
ily1210 10
you rly expect ppl to feel bad for you. YDI
SumKid_fml 0
Maybe you should reconsider your life for a sec? Doesnt really look like you "love your life" as your name says. Is it really worth losing your job for trying to leave 2 hours early? Especially with the way the economy is goin right now?