Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tested out my new paintball gun by firing a few rounds into some thick bushes. Nothing could've prepared me for the angry swarm of hornets whose nest I'd apparently shot. I'm in so much pain. FML
Today, a kid threw a rock at a beehive while my friend and I where standing next to it. It fell down, and a swarm of slightly displeased bees assumed that we were the culprit. Knowing what was about to happen, my friend and I ran for our lives. He ran fast enough to escape; I didn't. The kid, the actual culprit, didn't get attacked. FML
Today, I made a joke about my electric lawnmower sounding like a bunch of angry bees. It was verified when I ran over a beehive in my backyard. FML
Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML
Today, I was at a stop light and a bee landed on my leg. I screamed and started swatting it. It flew into my jacket and I started to strip my jacket off, taking my foot off the brake. I hit the car in front of me and deployed the air bag, breaking my nose. Then the bee stung me in the back. FML
Today, I saved a honey bee from drowning in our pool. It promptly stung me and died. FML
Today, I went to clean my roof when something buzzed by my head and a sting hit my neck. It turns out there's a small nest of, like, five hornets just chilling outside of my window. I found a dead one on the desk in my bedroom. FML
Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML
Today, I came home from work to find that my neighbor's trash bins were still on the curb. While returning the bins to her backyard, her kid ran out and shot me with a paintball gun. Multiple times. He thought I was a burglar and ruined my new suit. FML
Today, I was trying to swat a wasp in my bedroom. I got so frustrated that I ended up punching myself in the face. The wasp is still here, and now I look like I've been in a brawl. FML
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Top comments
supimnyancat 9
I pressed YDI after I read "Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest."
BountyBass 13
And so you should
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Comments (305)
hotbill 4
i would of done the same thang
fsamslife92 8
I wish I could thumb down your comment twice: once for the use of "would of" in the place of "would have" and once for the fact that you supposedly would have done the same thing.
murdersquirrel 15
Aw, leave that 13 year old girl alone! /sarcasm.
Ninjasaurus18 9
I love shooting guns at wasps' nests. Not bees' nests, though. Because bees are good for the world, but a wasp's only reason of life is to **** his hit up. So it's ok to ruin their nest.
uncivil 5
Look at its hair
bmbrls 2
Hey, look on the positive side, you'r an asshole
catkat1988 17
In the immortal words of Colonel Sherman Potter: "Listen, anybody would feel like a jerk if they had done what you did." What did you have to shoot paint balls at those bees for? What good could POSSIBLY come of that?
d12a 0
Ambushed
skyeyez9 25
I hope the neighbors didn't have small children.
blackblade 3
Tht is hilarious
MeeshaMeeshaPup 8
As my friend once said, "Just because you have a dick, doesn't mean you have to act like one!!" :D
efro4472 1
OMG this its a rip off of my FML!!!! Why did his get published and mine didn't?
Thatguy5806 2
What did you think was gonna happen. Don't feel bad if you have shitty neighbors. If their nice then, well... shit happens. Take them out to lunch or give them a homemade cake or coupon or something.
EdwardC777 9
I understand. You just weren't thinking, and it was a stupid mistake that you wish you can take back. But you can't unfortunately, and all you can do is apologize and learn from your mistake. YDI, but I don't doubt that you feel awful