Today, I saw a man lying on the street. He seemed unconscious, so, being a nurse I went over and found he had choked. I removed the object from his throat and used CPR to revive him. My reward? A mouthful of vomit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was taking a walk when I noticed an elderly man on the ground, unmoving. Being a registered nurse, I tried to give him CPR. As my lips touched his, he hacked a loogie and spat it into the back of my throat. I swallowed. FML
Today, I saw an old homeless man who had just fallen down due to his drinking. Everyone laughed at him, but I felt bad, so I went to help him up. My reward? A quick punch in the face, landing me in the hospital. FML
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I was volunteering at the hospital. This lady was calling the Nurses' Station, and I had to go see what she wanted. When I asked her what she needed, she mumbled something. As I leaned in closer to hear what she was saying, she threw up all over my face. Apparently, she was nauseous. FML
Today, at the gym, I see a person laying unconscious on the ground with people crowded around. Previously being a lifeguard, and knowing CPR, I ran over and asked a man what happened, preparing to check his vitals. I then realized that the body was a dummy and the employees were doing a drill. FML
Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML
Today, a mother and son were in my office. The kid wasn't feeling well and threw up. Mom covered his mouth with her hand, creating a vomit nozzle and covering me in puke. She yelled that I deserved to be sprayed on because I was not quick enough in getting a bucket for her son. FML
Today, I fainted. Instead of stopping to help, some guy stopped to draw a penis on my forehead. The EMT laughed. FML
Today, because I was the only manager scheduled, I went into work despite feeling sick to my stomach. While sitting down with a customer, I got the urge to throw up and tried to hold it back. Instead I vomited in my mouth, instinctively swallowed and started choking in front of the customer. FML
Today, I was at my job as a dental assistant and I was told to take an X-ray of a woman's teeth. As soon as I put the foam piece into her mouth, she projectile-vomited all over me and the floor. I had just started my 5-hour shift. FML
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Top comments
sjks 0
i think saving a life might be a reward
haweb 0
agree with everyone else. So you had to deal with an unappealing part of your job. I think it's worth it if it means saving someone's life.
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Comments (128)
littlemuffet 0
What kind of nurse expects a reward?
oogyboogy 6
if you properly know how to do cpr correctly that shouldnt happen you constatly have to watch to see if there is a pulse without a pusle that cant happen
epicfailceci 0
you dont look for a pulse dude, you find the area between the nipples and thrust 30 times no matter whehter they have a pulse. you're basically a manual heart for them, so you keep blood pumping through the body. dont check for a pulse >.< and dont hate on me, im a CPR trainer so you can probably trust me :P
shooter308 0
wait what? So what your saying is, if i come across an unresponsive person, I just start chest compressions and skip checking ABC's? So when I find out he is just extremely hammered, and I just broke 4 of his ribs for no reason, he sues me? I'm not being sarcastic (at this point), I just want to know what you train people. I learned BSI/scene safety, ABC's and LOC. If we go by the book...
Ranoona 0
you expected a reward?
AkujiD 0
People having a cardiac arrest tend to throw up, that's why first aiders carry face protection masks. I must say well done for doing CPR on him though, but don't whine about it, you should have been better prepared, being a nurse and all. But then again, nurses are the people who want to use flashy equipment. The first aiders are the people who know their basics expertly and are the real ones who save lives before defibrillators.
hk_fml 9
Nicely done :D
Lolly90 0
Oh well, that's what can happen. You should know, being a nurse.
dtubbz53 0
FML because you got a mouthful of puke : YDI because you think you need a reward...karma will reward you.
nic0pic0 0
if you're a nurse you know that a choking victim more often than not pukes after CPR.
Haitch 0
Hazards of being a nurse. Though I don't think I'd want to be worked on by someone who took a look at me and said "Ew, icky!" Nurses need balls of vomit-resistant steel. :/
DameGreyWulf 1
I'll say it again: No good deed goes unpunished. I guess now I understand those "ARE YOU /MAN/ ENOUGH TO BE A NURSE?" posters out there lol