Today, I sat on the toilet and fell off as the broken toilet seat slid off. As I fell, I grabbed the light cord in an effort to stop myself, and pulled it out of the ceiling. Now I can't use the toilet, and have to shower in the dark. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after dealing with tons of drama and working a 14 hour shift, I took a shower. When I stepped out, a weak spot in the floor gave way. While falling through the floor I grabbed the toilet tank lid, which fell into the tank and broke it. Now my leg hurts and the bathroom's flooded. FML
Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML
Today, I was moving into my new house. While trying to turn on the light in the bedroom, I realized I couldn't reach the string on the fan. I got a chair, climbed up, reached over, and fell badly. While writhing in agony on the floor, I looked over to see a light switch on the wall. FML
Today, I was taking a warm shower when someone in my house flushed the toilet, making the shower extremely hot. In my rush to get out so I wouldn't get burned, I slipped and knocked a tooth out. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom and slipped on some soap on the floor while I was washing my hands. As I fell, I grabbed the nearest thing to break my fall, which happened to be the hand dryer. It fell off the wall and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I sat down for a poop. The toilet seat slid off immediately, taking me with it. I lay on the bathroom floor for a moment, stunned, still pooping. FML
Today, as I stepped into the shower, I slipped and fell over the edge of the tub, pulling the shower curtain down with me. I called my roommate to help me up as I put on a towel over me. But before she could help me up, she grabbed her phone to take a picture. The picture became a mass text. FML
Today, I went to the bathroom at a friend’s house, used the toilet paper, and realized there was none left on the roll. I grabbed a replacement pack but it was all the way on the top shelf that was too high for me. I stood on tiptoes, balancing precariously on the toilet lid when it suddenly flipped down, knocking me off, and splashing pisswater everywhere. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet when I felt something brush my shoulder. I turned around in fright, and one of my bum cheeks slipped off the seat and into the toilet, making me fall sideways and hit my face on the toilet roll holder. I now have a black eye. It was my hair on my shoulder. FML
Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML
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Top comments
Mr_Alarm 12
That sounds like a shi- *gets shot*
Lemuel_fml 5
I wonder how the toilet seat broke in the first place...
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Comments (88)
mannykiddo 3
Look at the bright side! Wait....
deviable 9
I believe there is a dark cloud for every silver lining.
blunttobluntest 12
I moderated this this morning and cracked up! I didn't want to be rude, but this was very funny! Yes, I agree that morning wasn't your best!
margie4peace 11
You do know that lots of people moderate each story, right? It's not like you are solely responsible for the howling laughter. ;)
Spazz420 7
Women do it all the time it's called 'hover'
_Oblivion_ 12
aka the helicopter
ihavenosoul 4
Squatty potty!
Mr_Alarm 12
Well, I always called it "crouching over the toilet while taking a shit", but your descriptions are so much more graceful.
tfair85 2
You can't go to walmart and buy a new seat for $15 dollars and install it (only two screws and nuts?) It really isn't rocket science.
Lemuel_fml 5
What about Toilet Science? ... Yeah that was terrible.
sydnee14 7
Maybe you should look where they smart one!
sydnee14 7
Where they live I meant!
GameOver008 1
Showering with candle light is romantic
J3R3MYY 14
You just ruined it..
glittercookies 12
The picture goes with her comment
krad204 21
So fix it, putting a light fixture in is no hard job. Do you have a flashlight?
dstadler 6
I know right. It's all do it yourself go to a hardware store and they will tell u how
Wheredidgrungego 12
I like showering in the dark!
THeroinCZ 10
Those little situations just have to make you laugh ;)
countd0wn 0
Shower rave!!!
TraceCase_ 19
You should start watching the DIY network. After you've seen a few dozen bathroom makeovers and how easy they make it look, you should at least be inspired and confident enough to change your toilet seat.