Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, it's 2:23 in the morning, and my drunken girlfriend has just rung me up from a party where she's the only girl there. She seems to be having a great time. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, my girlfriend openly admitted to me that she wouldn't have gone out with me if she hadn't been drunk. FML
Today, my ex-girlfriend called saying she wants to get back together because of how mature and sincere I sounded last night. I despise her and I was drunk last night. FML
Today, I realized I willingly support my boyfriend's alcoholism, because the only time he says "I love you" is when he's blind drunk. FML
I was the bullet in the relationship
Today, for the first time in two years, I met my ex-girlfriend. I was drunk. FML
Today, I was laying with my girlfriend on the couch. I looked at her and said, "You're so beautiful. How did I ever get you?" She replied, "I was drunk." FML
Today, I received a drunken prank call from a girl I didn't know around 1am. I don't know what's sadder, that I carried out the conversation for 30 minutes, or that this was the first girl to call me in over a year. FML
Let down
Today, I was texting this guy that I really liked. Things were going pretty well. I got a call from his number and excitedly answered it. It was his girlfriend asking if he was bothering me because he likes to text random people when he's drunk. FML
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Top comments
ididitmyself 0
evanescence: you never call me when you're sober good song. enjoy.
froggi_fml 0
that's why u need to break up with her.
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Comments (60)
schwinn11 0
A drunk girl is a fun girl!
twinscrplayer6 0
I second this
perdix 31
Keep her liquored up and hide the number to AA. What seems to be the problem?
HanaxD 0
Isn't she lovely. :O
plutosaplanet 0
some girl that sleeps with you occasionally and calls you for a booty call only when shes drunk should in no way be considered your "girlfriend"
_tear_drops_ 0
shame, im like that gf - i didnt call my bf at all, only when i needed help / prank calls. He always called me ;D but then again, i didnt have much credit to call. our relationship lasted 2months. i wonder if you can say the same
infuzi0n 0
i'm jealous. sounds like a perfect relationship.
adair96 0
that's hilarious......lmao!! find some1 else, Hun.
lostfaithinpppl 19
So, instead of leaving her, going on with your life, and finding somebody who'll actually like you when sober you are complaining here on this site about it?
phatdaddy 0
That must suck. My Girlfriend only calls me when she wakes up in the morning, after lunch, when she's on the way to work, when she's having abd day at work, when she's getting out of work, before she goes to sleep, anytime someone tells her something she didn't know and no one else cares about, anytime she thinks about puppies, babies, or going to expensive restaurants (my PERSONAL favorite), or anytime her period is five minutes late... ... I'll trade you.
alexandraa_fml 0
LOL
kisseshugsdrugs 5
so you guys **** when shes drunk, thats a bootycall, not a relationship.