Today, I noticed that my penis looks tiny in my girlfriend's hands. Without thinking, I pointed it out to her. Now she thinks I have a small cock, and I think she has man-hands. Either way, we're both turned off. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and heavy. She had her shirt off, and commented on the small size of her breasts. Trying to make her feel better, I said I'd dated girls with smaller breasts. She replied by saying she'd dated bigger penises. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were snuggling and we placed our hands together, palm to palm. I can bend the tips of my fingers over hers, which apparently surprised her because she commented, "Huh, so big hands AREN'T related to penis size." FML
Today, my wife and I were with friends when she said that men who like guns all have tiny penises. "Seriously, even smaller than me!" I added, and only realized what I'd said when the laughter started. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having a casual conversation, when the topic suddenly became my penis. Before I knew what was going on, she said, "It's not the size that matters though. It's how you use it. So I guess you're ok." FML
Today, my girlfriend refered to her vagina as a meat wallet, and to my penis as small change. FML
Today, I found out that when you gain too much weight, your penis can get significantly smaller. After noticing that things had been "off" in the bedroom, my girlfriend and I decided to measure it. There was significant shrinkage. I guess it's time to start working out. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I lost our virginity to each other, or so I thought. I heard her on the phone with her sister saying that I’m definitely the smallest dick she’s ever had, but the size of my bank account encourages her to overlook my shortcomings. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, and she asked me if I ever get made fun of in the locker room for my small penis. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she was going to start appreciating the little things in life. She's starting with my penis. FML
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Top comments
etchsanity1 11
You pointed out your tiny penis to your girlfriend ... Who may have once been a dude... Ydi
lovepandorasaver 11
Well you single handedly ruined your relationship...
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Comments (112)
aliciamarie1 8
Most people don't even notice that stuff unless someone brings it up. Ydi
Fmlsea 28
And sex between you two shall be forever awkward !
sikkpsychodoll 3
No lie my best friend had the same problem, so i told him to date girls wit small hands so everythinh they grab looks big on there hands.. Try it out
Hellbound_Alleee 14
Wither way--that seems a tiny bit shallow for both of you. Really--all it takes is for her to have big hands? Am I watching Jerry Seinfeld here?
NicoleAshley10 0
You should've kept that to yourself; now you no longer will get hand jobs.
sugoine 12
Swedish penis pump??
Accuraxy 10
How would pointing out your small dick be in any way beneficial? YDI
withered 30
He needed to point it out so she actually noticed it.
AngelusCaedo 3
6 inches is the average, get a ruler
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Why the hell would you point that out?
I3eefChowFun 7
Bucky Larson, you're born to be a star.