Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, while I was running around the block, I got the urge to spit. Suddenly I noticed this beautiful girl running in front me. Trying to impress her, I smiled and by mistake drooled everything on the pavement. She wasn't impressed. FML
Today, I was walking to a job interview. I needed to get rid of some gum but there were no trash cans in sight, so I spat it out on the ground. Next thing I know, some guy grabs me, sticks the gum in my hair, and walks off, muttering curses. I couldn't get it out in time for the interview. FML
Today, after a dental appointment, my lips were numb. On the bus on my way back home, the cutest girl smiled at me. In attempt to smile back, I forgot my lips were numb and ended up spitting my chewing gum at her. I had to switch buses. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML
Today, I was at the mall with a couple of friends when we saw a couple of cute boys. I made eye contact with the cutest one. Flustered, I giggled, only to send a wad of snot flying out of my nose. FML
Today, I was on the phone with a client, when the gum I was casually chewing fell out of my mouth and down my shirt. While I was trying to dig it out, two of our newest customers walked into the lobby to see what looked like me fondling my breasts. FML
Today, in an effort to avoid my school's strict no-gum policy as my teacher made a b-line to me, I swallowed it. By the time the teacher reached me, the gum was on my desk, as well as my breakfast, thanks to my overactive gag reflex. FML
Today, I thought I was clever for doing my laundry while multitasking and making dinner. When I went to transfer my clothes from the washer to the dryer, I discovered that I'd accidentally washed a pack of gum that was in my pocket. The gum had melted into my favorite shirt, and I now have a sticky mess to deal with. FML
Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided to shove her face in the bubble. There's gum all over her, and I still have scars from the last time I tried bathe her. FML
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Top comments
Official_Person 0
You don't blow a bubble gum bubble if you're trying to impress someone. Unless you're six.
foolishworkerbee 0
i bet she was most impressed.
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Comments (228)
foolishworkerbee 0
i bet she was most impressed.
seanreddog 4
and she still didn't sleep with you? damn.
bleedinginside 0
beahha
afatmonkey 0
Yeah. I had this cat once but I offended this huge weight lifter guy and he stole it and used its soul to add tone to his pectoral muscles. This gave him a lot of power but a side effect was a loss of mental stability and a speech impediment. He is currently the governer of Americas most populated state.
Horney4her69 0
lesbo
redshortsx 0
why would you think that a girl would be impressed if you blew a bubble? try a Lao dance next time. and don't hit on a straight chic it freaks us out
ifmyheartwasahou 2
That's what you get for trying to look cool.
ScaryyMary 14
@18 Whaaaaat? A LESBIAN?! No way! Those are just a myth, like unicorns and girls who poop! They don't actually exist!
paigeatsflesh 11
17 I love you!
CharliePoops 0
sexy gum fail? damn you anti-flood protection!
jamie_leeann23 0
OP sorry to say this but your really stupid, haha, what ever happend to those corny pick up lines? no more blowing bubbles, say her hair looks nice or somthing.
pooley 0
I was also shocked when I found out they exist but not as shocked as I was when I met a leprecaun...
marleytooyou 0
haha
ScaryyMary 14
I got moderated? That was sarcasm! >:(
AJG390 0
You aren't supposed to reply to a comment anymore unless it is actually a reply to the comment. Thats probably why your comment got moderated.
AJG390 0
.
YourEvilHero 12
imptessive if you can do that I wonder what else u can do
woofis 0
why it's the new system of fml reply to the first comment to be seen! @op at least it wasn't ur gf
woofis 0
er.... scratch that I mean the girl u where trying to flirt with.
laxgirl3 0
he
seanreddog 4
My comment was a reply to # 1, but still it was moderated. I think the moderators are abusing their powers.
Tripout 0
OP left out the part where he gets his ass beat.
Sirin_fml 47
Post your comments in a self-contained manner, please. Posting an unrelated comment as a reply merely to get your comment higher up on the page is an abuse of the commenting system.
u_killed_kenny_ 0
yes I bet she was VERY impressed
Theblue_fml 0
Prepare for Lesbo action!! Sir Yes Sir!!
ScaryyMary 14
It was a reply to one of the comments!
tweetbaby14 18
at first I thought OP was a boy then I was gonna be all like oh yea super impressive... but yea still not impressive, and what if she wasn't a lesbian? did you even think of that OP?
Sirin_fml 47
@ScaryyMary: It was a reply to someone else's unrelated reply to #1 ;) As for u_killed_kenny_ and the others: simply reiterating what the person has said will not work. Stop playing games. If you don't have anything relevant to say, post it as a separate comment. If you are unable to follow the commenting rules you agreed to abide by when you posted your comment, then please cease posting comments altogether. End of discussion.
SanadB 0
probably not. the chances of her being a lesbian( no offense) since the op ddnt know her...
TrollHunter 0
very
massagenist 0
sirin good point but please FOAD.
ipts 0
u think guys blowing bubbles are hot? what a F a G
StoryOfTheYear 15
o yes, must've been impressed, smooth as sandpaper
massagenist 0
im impressed , girls who blow bubbles are also good at blowing other things with their mouth.
marinlabyrinth 0
it's a woman idiot.
ipts 0
oh wait! ur a girl.... nvm then! try again i guess! :D
Theblue_fml 0
I would've been most impressed too. Then I would've used my firehose to clean it up.
YOULIVETODIE 0
Your Lesbian?!
ScaryyMary 14
So... you're saying I got moderated for a reply that was related to an unrelated reply? That makes sense, I guess.
Sirin_fml 47
It was a continuation of an irrelevant thread, and all of it's now been removed. It has no bearing on your standing on the site, don't worry. Now, let's enjoy the site and leave the drama behind us.
ScaryyMary 14
It's not over til the fat lady sings! >:O
hotscar 3
so theop's lesbian?
Peacemaker9 7
then comes the " let's get ready to rumble!!!!!!" voice as an annoucement in the store
angelkissezxox 3
lol scarrymarry made me laugh(: oops is this unrelated? am i gonna getvmoderated nd banned frm fml? oh no its the end of the world.
rawr_iliketacos 0
"And your total is gonna be 19.2....OH MY GOD BUBBLE! Must....look....at..BUBBLE! Oh, wait, eww.." lol OP that's so not attractive, don't spit on yourself next time...good luck! :D
TheLetterZero 7
The comment system abuse is JUST NOW getting attention?! Wow. OT: Flirtatious + thinking blowing a bubble would work = YDI.
iitz4l3x 0
SIRIN FTL!!!!!!!!!
greatsarcazm 0
ot? fail
5lug 0
who the hell blows a bubble to ATTEMPT at a girl, I'm guessing bubbles aren't the only thing you blow on a regular basis
humorizer 14
@Rawr I like tacos; I find it funny that you of all people would be complaining about people blowing bubbles. Just saying.
5lug 0
bubbles probly aren't the only thong you blow on a regular basis. huh?
wilkshire13 0
if u haven't noticed sirin and co. all of ur posts are unrelated to the fml at hand, hypocrits
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Sirin ftw! I'm fed up of the idiots abusing the comment system because they're a bunch of attention ******. I'm glad FML is FINALLY taking care of it. Late, but still good. :)
Peacemaker9 7
and that's when a voice on the annocement pa system said after u spit on the guy: " let's get ready to rumble!!!!!!!!" then bam the dude knocks u out and get the girl instead!!!!
bezach 0
(insert snickerdoodles singing joke here)
BrownSugar_fml 5
lol 5lug said thong!!! It totally works out since the op is a girl checking out another girl.
Jrook 0
I like how rawr or whatever says bubble blowing is not attractive, then has a picture o them blowing a bubble lol. and op's an idiot lol, most unimpressive
tweetbaby14 18
sirin that's 100% unfair because stuff you're posting is unrelated, so why aren't you moderating yourself?
iitz4l3x 0
sirin is unfair!
squirrelboyzz 0
first , and flirtation fail.
Official_Person 0
You don't blow a bubble gum bubble if you're trying to impress someone. Unless you're six.
Monikabug 9
Exactly what I was thinking! When I see a guy blow a bubble, I do not think "Wow! That guy is smoking hot." It's more like "Hm.. I want some bubble gum." That is pretty funny though, OP. Next time, if you decide to stick with the bubble-blowing, try to keep control of it. FYL. :)
penizulaface 0
the bubble blower was a girl, kiddyo ;o
Monikabug 9
@21 Oh pardon me. Let me rephrase. (As if you could not do this yourself..) Exactly what I was thinking! When I see a girl blow a bubble, I do not think "Wow! That chick is smoking hot." It's more like "Hm.. I want some bubble gum." That is pretty funny though, OP. Next time, if you decide to stick with the bubble-blowing, try to keep control of it. FYL. :)
alexandraa_fml 0
Male or female, they were trying to impress the other person with their 'blowing' skill.. If it's girl on girl, shes doing it wrong. :F
Theblue_fml 0
They are definitely lesbo
ImaginaryFoe 1
Monika (#40) FTW
MF12 0
I was thinking that he OP blew the bubble to get her attention, not to impress her. Like to make the girl see a big pink thing next to her, or hear a pop and look at the OP.
Official_Person 0
The point isn't that it's who is impressing who. Heck, it could be a girl impressing a monkey! The point is that blowing bubbles isn't the way to impress or even get the attention of anyone. It's just plain annoying...
Sunset_Taco 0
Lol. If you try to act sexy by blowing a bubble from bubble gum, then you are probably a *****, and if you're a guy like the OP, then you obviously can't impress a girl.
zydr8 0
Lol! "blowing skill"
MangaFreakXxX 0
How many YDI's do you think she's gonna get for being a lesbian? Some people on this site...
Zigster94 0
oh maaan, and then you licked it all off and winked at her ?
locklock 0
r u a lesbian
Jessi_Rose96 0
That's just sad. if you did that around me, I would burst out laughing, walk to my car, and tell everyone I knew. I guess idiocy never goes out of style, if it was even IN style in the first place.
linamerri 0
what crawled up your ass and died??... bitch
afatmonkey 0
Whatever it was it was hotter than you. It was probably a detached llama dong. With AIDS.
vrock 0
eww, your sooooooo ugly!!!
Monikabug 9
What car? You're 14 years old. ._.
toaster468 0
lol
paigeatsflesh 11
#8=ew
linamerri 0
I bet she used it to attempt to take her virginity too.. which is why the llama didn't want it anymore
Sunset_Taco 0
49, go **** yourself. How a person could be that cruel without having some mental disorder is beyond me.
CheshireHalli 19
Your profile says you only turn into a bitch when provoked, I see nobody that provoked you, so why? =)
StoryOfTheYear 15
152- I actually think that was one of the funniest posts I've seen all day
goldenone 2
yo, Jessi it wouldn't happen to you in the first place so don't worry bout it.
Guerilla8 0
snickerdoodle?
linamerri 0
haha nice try but I have seen **** considering I have them.. oh ya and I have a life.. I run LA BiTcH
DGross 8
lol @72...
RuukasuNinja 0
tarynkd = worse than snickerdoodles
samantha_durano 6
that's attractive.
ipts 0
dayam. ur attractive
samantha_durano 6
lol, thanks:)
StoryOfTheYear 15
he'll have girls all over him with that sleek move :)
RuukasuNinja 0
Sam you are seriously hot stuff
flippyyfeatherr 0
smooooothh
xHollowx 0
Man, you really know how to charm them.
awesomechica1229 5
haha I bet that got her attencion, if I was her I would have thought that was cute
awesomechica1229 5
oops just saw op was a girl, my bad, but if you were a guy I would think it was cute
awesomechica1229 5
oops just saw op was a girl, my bad, but if you were a guy I would of thought it was cute.