Today, I made an attempt to be nicer to customers at my job as instructed, which resulted in me listening to a handful of elderly people's incontinence issues, and a meth-addict's multiple abortions in detail. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on the phone with an elderly customer at work. I had to spend 10 minutes listening to him describe how the underwear he bought was too tight and caused his bladder to leak. FML
Today, I had a customer tell me how much she regretted not aborting her expected child, how much she hates the father, and described to me in immense detail what it is like to pee while pregnant. All within the 30 seconds it took me to serve her. FML
Today, I was working when I delivered the standard "Hello, how are you?" to a customer. He took the opportunity to tell me about his deceased wife, his estranged children, and his anal tearing. After a while, I tried to help someone else, and he complained to my manager. I was written up. FML
Today, at my job, I was so tired and aggravated that I accidentally mumbled, "I need a drink." One of the patients I was taking care of heard me and said, "Me too." I work at an addiction rehab facility. FML
Today, I sold cigarettes to a woman who promptly told me that she smoked meth. It's only my second night working this job. FML
Today, I made a patient really happy. I work in a long term care facility and was changing a woman's diaper. While cleaning her, I somehow managed to give her an orgasm with a warm wash cloth. FML
Today, as I was bagging groceries, I looked down to see a 6-year-old urinating on my shoes and the floor next to me. I told his mother that he should take her kid to the restroom, only to be told to "mind my own goddamn business." I was later fired for arguing with the customer. FML
Today, I once again had to clean up a shower and bathroom covered in feces, because of client with incontinence. It smelt so bad that I couldn’t hide my reaction; the client saw my face and I could see the embarrassment on theirs. I spent the rest of the day feeling like an asshole. FML
Today, during my shift at work, I started to feel really sick and started throwing up. While I had my head in a bag, I had several customers ask me for directions, and another customer abuse me for my lack of service. FML
Today, I spent the first two hours of my shift cleaning up liquid poo after an elderly lady sat in one of our chairs and promptly let go of her bowels. I was so embarrassed for her that I even bought her a towel, underwear, and a pair of pants. She then thanked one of my coworkers for all the help. FML
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Top comments
abbyade 21
It depends on where you work. As a physiotherapist working in a mental health unit, that's my bread and butter listening to incontinence issues and some other weird stories. However, good on you for listening. They feel appreciated and wanted just being listened to.
CaptMacLeod 45
I'm going to guess you work in a pharmacy? People always assume that Associates have the expertise of the Pharmacist, and that the Pharm is a doctor. I feel for you.
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Comments (39)
hardcorefan16 22
That must suck, sorry OP!
abbyade 21
It depends on where you work. As a physiotherapist working in a mental health unit, that's my bread and butter listening to incontinence issues and some other weird stories. However, good on you for listening. They feel appreciated and wanted just being listened to.
dhiran_singh 16
That's true. It's also helps us when we try to think and find ways to help them.
dhiran_singh 16
We all needs ears to hear and a voice to be heard and eyes to look out for people and be seen.
SpyroMello 29
I'm not a physiotherapist but I'm pretty sure people who listen to others problems and help with their mental health is a psychotherapist, psychologist, or even a regular therapist. I'm also probably gonna get down voted.
abbyade 21
If you work in healthcare, you don't just do your clinical duties alone. There are other duties of care you need to be able to provide effectively. Just because I'm a Physio doesn't mean I can't listen to patients. Listening is part of communication and isn't necessarily only for a psychologist to provide. How will you like it if your relative was talking to me about something sensitive during a therapy session and I said, this isn't my job..wait for a psychologist??? Also listening is a good way of knowing if safeguarding needs to be put in place.. Especially for vulnerable adults and children.
olliebush123 15
be nice they said, there not all meth heads they said
A07 48
technically it's just one meth head out of a handful
CaptMacLeod 45
I'm going to guess you work in a pharmacy? People always assume that Associates have the expertise of the Pharmacist, and that the Pharm is a doctor. I feel for you.
BamBAmGG 14
That's customer service for you. It never ceases to not be strange.
darshini_ii 24
You could be curt without snapping.
crudeandrudeguy 29
He prefers Curtis...
darshini_ii 24
It was an attempt, and if it's an FML he didn't like it too much
CheekyRaccoon 27
Look on the bright side, now you can have stories to tell other people. Also if you're good at writing, you could make an amazing book called "The weird and wacky adventures of Matthew McGee" from those stories.
xx000o 27
Another satisfied Walmart employee.
Red_140 5
That's what you get for being nice I guess. Works the same way with women too
Mathalamus 25
I wouldn't bother being nice. I would just do my job in total silence, if possible. If I can shop in silence, then it should be easy.