Today, I'm spending time with my granny, with whom I'm supposed to live with for a few weeks. I've noticed that she repeats the last word of every sentence I say, and now I'm wondering how it's possible for me to now be so horrible that I want to punch a sweet 92-year-old lady in the head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my grandmother hates me. So much so that I've become a rotten, desperate, and overall evil person with no thoughts and considerations towards other people. My family doesn't know this, but I can never undo the damage she has done to me since birth (as she raised me). I only care about my own well-being, nothing else. FML
Today, after my mom moved our senile grandma in with us rather than find her a care home, she wakes up screaming at least once a night, and usually screams for a good few minutes. Then this morning she started throwing plates at me because she thought I was a criminal. It's only been four days. FML
Today, my psycho grandma yelled at me for being an "immature brat" by not offering to wash the dishes after dinner. I reminded her that when I offered last time, she raged at me for being "condescending." She responded by faking a heart attack and getting me indefinitely grounded. FML
Today, I decided to spend a few days at my grandma's house, to help her clean the place up a bit. So far, she's given me a "no masturbating under my roof" talk, used multiple racist slurs, and yelled "QUIET DOWN!" when I so much as sneezed in the next room. FML
Today, it's been one week since my demented grandma babysat my five-year-old daughter while my husband took me to a fancy restaurant. Now she's taken to screaming and calling me a "damn commie" whenever I discipline or say no to her. FML
Today, I was confiding in my grandma about how lonely I am and how everything in my life seems to be falling apart. While I was in mid-sentence, she rolled her eyes and made a show of removing her hearing aid. FML
Today, I had a fight with my grandma again with whom I've been living for four years due to college hostel being below par. She blamed me for destroying her kitchen equipment by extensively cooking, especially at night. I've never placed a foot inside her kitchen since the beginning. FML
Today, my grandmother told me to say "sofa king retarded" really fast. Not only did it take me several attempts to figure out what it meant, I'm now grounded by my mother for having a foul mouth. FML
Today, I decided to be nice and pay a visit to my grandma. We ended up playing Scrabble. In between passing wind that smelled like rotting eggs, she kept playing the filthiest words she could, and yelled at me whenever I checked to see if they were in the Scrabble dictionary. FML
Today, just like every day for the past two weeks, my mother has told me just how much she doesn't want me to move out. I, once again, have had to remind her that she isn't the one I'm trying to get away from. I'm not a fan of being repeatedly smacked with a coffee mug by my 78-year-old grandma. FML
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Top comments
adameeo 21
Atleast you admitted it was horrible to think it
AlaskaKid95 7
Old people test my patience too.
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Comments (144)
bramberkhout 10
Haha laughed so hard! Try to avoid her ;).
zebrapattern 6
wow. someday when you're old and are totally helpless, you're going to look back on this and want to kick yourself. old people are old. OLD. have you ever dealt with a clock whose battery is dying? and it's slightly off and doesn't work as well as it used to? yeah. think of that, only a human. do you know how frustrated that old woman must be? knowing she'd not as sharp as she used to be? and then you come along wining you could punch her in the head. No sympathy for you whatsoever.
FYLDeep 26
It's still an FML for the OP for having to deal with it. Plus, I highly doubt that the OP is actually being a dick to her in person.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Someone has a case of "asshole syndrome". Plus living with her would get on your nerves, now would it?
FYLDeep 26
Oh, I've heard about this before. It's called Parrot Syndrome.
Mister_Triangle 21
Is the solution to feed her crackers and lend her to your hippy friend while you go vacation?
thisseemsfishy 1
That would be a really sweet name for it, but Parrot's Syndrome is actually a type of dwarfism. Echolalia is the condition being described and it may be worth taking her to the doctor as it can be linked with dementia though I'm by no means diagnosing based on an FML :P just always worth having a check-up xx
FYLDeep 26
When I made up Parrot Syndrome in my head a few minutes ago, I never thought to Google it to see it it's really a thing. That seems like it would be pretty unlikely.
rexcanis 10
No, the solution is to end all of your sentences with funny words or curse words.
monzach 5
This why duct tape exists. (-)> .||- |_|~ ^Attempted duck
hippo1234 19
Your duck has a dick...
ashwowa 14
looks like a duck with a boner
cBlackout 13
So.. Therapy may be needed..
abbey321 8
Needed
chelseaaababyyy 17
aw, thats horrible /: that reminds me of Brick from The Middle though lol
SpeshulK 0
Head
Miguemex95 4
Those little things grannies do are the things that make them awesome! :) you should take it with humor dude.
vivalabrett 0
Weeks. Head.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Are you trying to be a grammar nazi?? Those words are used and spelled fine..
KyuuketsukiApple 30
30- No, 27 is attempting humour by repeating words in the FML, like OP's granny.
taekim895 0
Punching her in the head could kill her. Just slap her head...
rabbittboi 18
Because that's not elder abuse? And you're not a fucktard if you just slap her?