Today, I learned the valuable lesson that taking care of a baby crow isn't the best idea. He finally can fly away, but sits on my porch all day cawing for food. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a crow somehow got stuck in my ceiling. It's been making tons of noise for 9 hours now, including crowing very loudly. I live in a one-bedroom apartment, I have no access to the attic and the property owner doesn't give a shit. FML
Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML
Today, the bird that has been stuck in my roof for two days, keeping me awake at night, finally flew out of the roof and into the house. As I was opening the door to send it outside, it flew straight back up into the roof. FML
Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML
Today, since I've been paying attention to my newborn, my pet cockatoo has learned to cry like the baby in the middle of the night. I haven't gotten more than four hours of sleep. FML
Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML
Today, I saved a baby bird from the site I work on. It was the runt and did not have any feathers and was neglected by the mother. I took care of it all day at work and planned on taking it to a wildlife reserve after work. Two minutes away from the reserve, we hit a pothole and I dropped it. It died. FML
Today, I spent hours making an elaborate bird feeder for my backyard. It was finally ready, and I proudly hung it up, imagining the birds chirping happily. Instead, a squirrel discovered it within minutes, devoured all the birdseed, and then gave me a smug look before knocking the feeder to the ground. FML
Today, I was showing off my new pet bird to my friends over video chat. I opened the cage to demonstrate how friendly he was. Instead of perching on my finger like usual, he flew out the window. I spent the next hour chasing him around the neighborhood in my pajamas. FML
Today, I saw two crows in a park using their beaks to kiss each other. A fucking crow gets more action than I do. FML
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Top comments
JMichael 26
It's like when you feed a stray cat one time and it keeps coming back for more. Eventually it's gonna end up being yours.
websphere69 27
never more
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Comments (147)
JustAnotherDoge 6
Well, at least it sounds like you were a good pet owner.
peggscott 14
But a pet crow is kinda cool as ****...
grgnyce 8
Time to adopt!!
evalu8tor 12
Call Audubon for some advice, they rescue and raise baby birds by the thousands
moshpit11 8
Put out some uncooked rice problem solved
Tyto_Tenebricosa 8
You say baby crow, how young are we talking here? It varies widely on species, but birds imprint on what feeds them as a chick, they then identify themselves the same as what fed them, birds that are hand reared by humans think that humans and themselves are the same species. Did you 'kick it out of the nest' at the correct age as its parents would in the wild? If you keep them too long then they don't mature properly and think that you (The parent) will look after them and feed them forever and will vocalize for food even if they are more than capable of getting it themselves. I'm not a crow 'specialist', I'm more of a bird of prey specialist so I'm just going from what I know with Owls, Hawks and Falcons etc. Anyway chances are you've landed yourself a pet crow, trying to force it to live somewhere else won't work, it'll either starve or find its way back home as crows are intelligent enough for that.
Blippety 23
If OP touched it, it can't just "find its way home", because it will now smell of human and therefore be rejected by its family.
Brandi_Faith 34
93, I heard that, that smell thing was untrue. Not sure if it is though
ohishkabibble 21
#93 That is a load of crap that needs to stop being spread around, seriously. But yeah, #73, thanks for that post! OP really should've taken it to a wildlife sanctuary; choosing to take care of it was a horrible idea, bc you should really be trained for it. I know rehabilitators have to be really careful with baby crows so they don't imprint, because my girlfriend volunteered at a sanctuary for a while and they had to be extremely careful and maintain minimal contact with them for the greatest chance of successful rehabilitation.
Matttis 7
But it IS the best idea because now you have a freaking CROW as a pet! Do you have any idea how jealous I am right now?!
chazzywazzy654 22
Just dont feed it anymore, it will soon leave, as it will have to eat to survive.
lacosh 4
It would be cool to have a pet crow. People who come over would instantly get nervous n be like oh shit she's a witch. At least you wouldn't have very many break ins
Zab_D0mino 1
A lot of people have commented on how intelligent crows are, but they are also extremely social. As someone else has pointed out, like many birds they identify their caregiver as their parent from a young age, even if said caregiver is not a crow. In this case, the crow has identified OP as its parent and they house as its home. The best chance OP has to get it to leave without have to resort to letting it starve on their front porch is to try and take it to an area where a group of the same species of crows can be found. If there are none near OP's house, the crow has no reason to leave, as it doesn't know of any other social group it could move to. Hopefully, by taking it near conspecifics, it will be able to vocalize with them and join the group, where it would quickly learn how to feed itself properly. Ideally, OP should try and take it to the area where they found it in the first place. Its native group might still be there. If that fails then, as others have already said, OP could always take it to a vet or bird specialists.