Today, I learned the valuable lesson that taking care of a baby crow isn't the best idea. He finally can fly away, but sits on my porch all day cawing for food. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a crow somehow got stuck in my ceiling. It's been making tons of noise for 9 hours now, including crowing very loudly. I live in a one-bedroom apartment, I have no access to the attic and the property owner doesn't give a shit. FML
Today, I witnessed the beautiful sight of a tiny baby bird struggling to take flight from its nest. "You can do it," I muttered, which I guess my asswipe of a cat heard as "Quick, go kill that bird and scar me for life, please." FML
Today, the bird that has been stuck in my roof for two days, keeping me awake at night, finally flew out of the roof and into the house. As I was opening the door to send it outside, it flew straight back up into the roof. FML
Today, I was caring for a bird that had flown into my window. I thought the poor thing wouldn't make it, when it shit in my hand, flew into my neck, then around my living room for ages before I could manage to get it out of the window. FML
Today, since I've been paying attention to my newborn, my pet cockatoo has learned to cry like the baby in the middle of the night. I haven't gotten more than four hours of sleep. FML
Today, I saved a bird from being run over as it lay in the middle of the road. Thinking it had a broken wing or something, I started carrying it home, intending to take it to the vet later. It crapped in my hand and flew away. FML
Today, I saved a baby bird from the site I work on. It was the runt and did not have any feathers and was neglected by the mother. I took care of it all day at work and planned on taking it to a wildlife reserve after work. Two minutes away from the reserve, we hit a pothole and I dropped it. It died. FML
Today, I spent hours making an elaborate bird feeder for my backyard. It was finally ready, and I proudly hung it up, imagining the birds chirping happily. Instead, a squirrel discovered it within minutes, devoured all the birdseed, and then gave me a smug look before knocking the feeder to the ground. FML
Today, I was showing off my new pet bird to my friends over video chat. I opened the cage to demonstrate how friendly he was. Instead of perching on my finger like usual, he flew out the window. I spent the next hour chasing him around the neighborhood in my pajamas. FML
Today, I saw two crows in a park using their beaks to kiss each other. A fucking crow gets more action than I do. FML
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Top comments
JMichael 26
It's like when you feed a stray cat one time and it keeps coming back for more. Eventually it's gonna end up being yours.
websphere69 27
never more
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Comments (147)
Headcrab 29
Crows can be domesticated. Seems like you succeeded.
ohSNAPyall 27
Doesn't Uncle Billy have a pet crow in 'It's a Wonderful Life'?
Rallred32 20
I swear the only reason I watched that show was to see his train. :p
Siettadulce 21
The more important thing is that you are actually taking the time and generosity to care for it so don't worry OP, it will get easier!
Schizomaniac 24
You know nothin, Jon Snow.
Crofty92 17
I shall live and die by my porch.
Enslaved 38
This made me think of Jake from "The Shawshank Redemption".
Gravenmuir 18
That was the first thing I thought! Brooks was here!
Soundslikeothers 15
I hear you OP, same things with babies I mean you take care of them, feed them, and once they learn how to walk they keep on coming back wanting more. How annoying!!
dimple13194 10
Kinda sweet
Crofty92 17
Call it Russell
91hayek 31
I'd rather name it your name. Crofty the Crow. Has alliteration and a nice ring to it.
slyde32 12
just like it would have if he didn't help it, at least he gave it a fighting chance now, jeez, no good deed goes unpunished, does it
Goblin182 27
A group of corws is called a murder. One crow is called attempted murder.
cakefete2 31
Two crows mating is voluntary man slaughter.
cakefete2 31
Yea, they can name the daughter Cheryl and the son can be Russell. Ooh and OP can be grandpappy crow.