Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was so drunk that I gave my mom's number instead of mine to the really cute guy I met at the bar. FML
Today, I looked in my pocket for the phone number of a girl I met last night at a party. I remembered us talking and exchanging phone numbers. When I found the piece of paper, I discovered that instead of writing her number down, I had drunkenly written down my own. FML
A nickname that sticks
Today, I was at my friend's house celebrating his 16th birthday. I couldn't find my phone so I asked my friend's girlfriend if I could borrow her phone to see if I could hear mine ringing. I dialed my number, only to find she had my number saved in her phone as "ASS FACE #3". FML
Today, I was drunk and sent my friend a picture of my penis. He edited the picture and put hands and sunglasses on it before sending it to practically everyone I know. FML
Today, I met a cute girl at a dance club. I entered her number in my phone just before she left the club. With a proud smile, I turned the screen towards my buddy, showing off my accomplishment. Attempting to give me a friendly pat he accidentally closed my phone. I hadn't saved the number. FML
Today, I finally found the courage to ask a guy I like out for a drink. He accepted, we drank, and when it came time to go home, I half-drunkenly left him my number. Once I got back home, I realized I'd actually given him my dad's number instead. FML
Feels bad man
Today, I went to a bar with some buddies, and after trying to pick up a few girls, one of my friends got a number. When I heard the number, I said, "Sorry man, that's definitely the rejection hotline number." So many girls have given me that number, I've memorized it. FML
Hey you
Today, my friend asked me if I flirted with any girls during our shift. I said, "No, not any I could think of." He then told me there was a note on my windshield that said, "Call me" with a phone number on it. After my shift, I went to my car excited and read the note. It was just a penis. FML
Girl…
Today, I got a text message. It said, "I'm so drunk. What you up to, girl?" It was my dad. FML
Experimenting
Today, I woke up from a drunken daze and texted my best friend to take me back to my car. I got confused as to why our messages were green since it was iMessage. Well, come to find out I hooked up with her boyfriend in the bathroom the night before. I should mention I'm a dude, and so is he. FML
Top comments
shaytards_fml 9
a guy sent me a pic once, I couldn't open it, so I gave to my father. it was a penis too...
blackonblight 33
Because "no" is met with "why not?" "Don't be a bitch" "just give me a chance" "******* **** I bet you gave it out to very one else you just don't want to admit you're a *****" "frigid bitch I was tryina be nice see what that gets me?" And so on and so forth?
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Comments (116)
fakedsincerity 32
at 2.17am, crazy drunk, it probably seemed like a good idea. :o
Xotoolyxo 16
She'll never know you gave out her number unless you confess....what she doesn't know can't hurt her
MiataHarley07 6
It's called sarcasm. 42 was being sarcastic.
AngryD 9
that's got to be one of the best cases of karma getting back at someone I have ever heard I bet next time you do the right thing and just tell them no
Pyro_Wolf 17
Apparently it is 4. One of my friends got a picture of a some guy's dick with a pen in it. She never even saw the guy before.
Muttley9 13
Dear Random Tipsy Bar Girl... see what you're missing! :)
Curlytwirly22 17
This is not your fault it's the idiot that sent the picture's fault !!
paigexox0 37
All i had to do was read most of your comments on this fml and i know why
Mademoiselle_fml 34
The amount of YDIs on this is disgusting and disheartening. How in the world does anybody ever deserve an unsolicited dick pic?
TallMist 32
If she hadn't gotten drunk, she would have been focus enough to not give them her mom's number.
Rojod 13
In the Netherlands we got number, that if you call it, always gives you the voicemail. They broadcast all of the sms and voicemail on the radio! 06-12324444! :D