Today, my 175-pound rottweiler I've raised since a puppy watched me get jumped and robbed of my phone and money in my yard. An hour later, he hopped the fence and chased the mail man down the street after he leaned on the fence for a second. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and got robbed at knifepoint. The robber made away with my phone, cash, and debit cards… and the French Bulldog I’m still making monthly payments for. FML
Today, my 97-pound pitbull wagged and chased his tail while I was being mugged. FML
Today, I was pickpocketed. I didn't realize until I stopped to get breakfast. I went back home to see that my dog had taken my wallet and had ripped and torn it up. I was pickpocketed by my own dog. FML
Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML
Today, my boyfriend's vicious dog, which he got as a security measure and growls and barks at me whenever I go near it, was caught on our security camera playing like a puppy with a burglar, while the other two burglars cleaned out all our valuables. FML
Today, my dogs broke through our electric fence, one of whom managed to get his collar off. I picked it up and, without thinking, went across the fence line. I screamed like a chihuahua being run over by a bulldozer. FML
Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML
Today, I took my dog to the park. While chatting with another dog owner, my dog managed to steal their sandwich and ran off with it. I had to chase my sandwich-thieving dog through the entire park. FML
Today, my fully grown, 90-pound German Shepherd sniffed and wagged his tail as a guy mugged me. FML
Today, as I was going to check the mail, a huge dog ran into my house. The closest room with a door was the bathroom so I slammed myself inside and screamed for help. We live far from any neighbors and my phone was outside, so there was no hope of rescue. It paced outside the door for four hours. FML
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Top comments
joea21 21
Everyone knows the mailman is the dogs arch-nemesis
skellingtonfart 18
You can't rely on your dog to protect you, when it comes down to it, they're probably just as scared and confused as you are in that situation, no matter how big and scary they look!
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Comments (139)
Drew90001 4
Wow. That's no fun.
michaelaranda 28
Well, dogs do have a history of hating mail men. And op, im guessing you didn't exactly train your dog to be a guard dog. Dogs aren't violent animals that will just attack a random human being on pure instinct. they need to be trained to do that.
Ashamed_Sister 60
@25: I don’t think so. It’s a dog’s natural instinct to protect his or her home and pack. If OP got attacked within the confines of his own yard and his dog didn’t react something seems to be wrong with that dog.
negb 30
Usually if a dog sees his owner getting attacked, they react in a protective way. It's not their natural instinct to attack humans but it is their natural instinct to protect their owner (or pack, like the person above me said).
Ashamed_Sister 60
@35: I hope pack is the correct English word; at least my dictionary said so. I meant to describe the group (or herd) of dogs or wolves.
skyttlz 32
My dog was home when we got robbed and acted like nothing was wrong. My mom thinks she just layed on the couch and watched. My dog isn't the brightest star in the sky.
synsam 4
sounds to me like it was a nonviolent robbing instead of a beat down style grab and go.
Shadowbay 18
If I yell "OWW" my dog would attack the other person and stops when I say it's ok. A fun game to play with the family :) luckily that ones the smaller dog...
Crazc 15
#53 it says he got jumped and I'm not sure there is a non violent jumping.
negb 30
@37 - yes, that's the correct word. Dogs usually see any humans or other animals in their household as their pack so they would be protective of them.
TunaFireStarter 16
My dog just walked up to the men who robbed me at gunpoint and then gave them a good long sniff, turned around, and sat down. I like to think that he did it because he was smart enough that if he attacked them, they likely would have hurt him since he is small. Or because what they were doing was laughable and not really scary ... That's probably not why though.
EverestMelting 23
Maybe your dog and the mugger was in it since the beginning..? You better watch your back OP!!
KK3137 31
Or maybe it was just because he saw interaction between you and the mugger in your yard, but when the mailman came he was defending his terrotory since you weren't (perhaps) around.
skellingtonfart 18
You can't rely on your dog to protect you, when it comes down to it, they're probably just as scared and confused as you are in that situation, no matter how big and scary they look!
OscarDV 8
That and the mugger may have been around the house before and is probably acquainted with the dog to where he wouldn't attack him.
SkyGuy32 17
The best way to avoid this is to train your dog specifically for self protection by having commands for attacking, ceasing attack, and specifying a target.
joea21 21
Everyone knows the mailman is the dogs arch-nemesis
Tymaster5 22
Besides pussy.
crazytwinsmom 25
I adopted a dog that apparently hated anyone in any sort of uniform, mailmen included.
tiger8255 13
#40 Just be lucky you don't have to wear a uniform around your dog. If you do have to… FYL too.
DanielRamirez 10
Haha i see what you did there.....Clever
revelation11B 10
That's man's best friend for ya.
miss_mercy 15
A little bit of a downer, but you really might wanna train your dog.
Wonder_Woman257 11
The need to get their dog Shutzhund trained, it is basically guard dog training.
TehPurdo 4
"Shutzhund" would mean "protection dog," right?
Wonder_Woman257 11
It is where they teach the dog to attack on command, it is really cool. I have seen some of the classes and the dogs are super well behaved, they have to be or they can't learn it
TallMist 32
How to Train Your Dog doesn't have quite the same ring to it as How To Train Your Dragon
revvy38 4
Kick that dogs ass! Littke bastard is supposed to protect his owner
killmenow03 21
What is WRONG with you?
joea21 21
Agreed with #16... You have issues Michael Vick.
killmenow03 21
Did you get kicked in the head as a baby or something??
euphoricness 28
You tell it like it is, Sata- I mean sister!
coried91 28
Damn... My mom used to get chased home from school by that breed. I'm surprised they just sat there.
parism143 28
Not every dog of the same breed is the same. You're pretty much being breed-racist.
coried91 28
Yeah, I'm "breed racist". I wasn't just going off of that one instance with my mom. I had a friend that had a rottie and if the dog sensed that you had any issues with him or their owner it wasn't pleasant to you. He wasn't trained to be that way either. That's why I said that.
Wonder_Woman257 11
Same with my dad, but he still has had them as pets
Catahoulaqueen_fml 17
75- uh, DUH. Dogs are usually very in tune with the 'vibes' people send out. if they can tell you don't like them or their owner, they will act accordingly. my dog loves everyone... except people I don't like. then she'll avoid them. EVERY dog does it. anyways, there's a saying- judge the deed, not the breed. because your mom got chased by a rottie doesn't make them all vicious. educate yourself.
coried91 28
I never said they were all vicious... I love rotties jackass. I've just never seen one not be protective. That's all I was saying. My mom got chased because she seriously pissed one off by hitting their owner. I left that out to keep the comment short. If you think I'm hating on bully breeds just know I own two pits. I'm not uneducated. As I stated, I've just never seen one not be protective.
Catahoulaqueen_fml 17
I like how you call me a jackass, then message me, then BLOCK ME so I can't reply lol classy Anyways, you should watch how you phrase things because you certainly come across as doggy racist. I sincerely doubt your pits exist,because if they did, you'd watch what you say. people like to take things about 'bully' breeds and twist them.
Pyro_Wolf 17
116- My friend has a rottweiler, and she thinks that she is a sweet, lapdog.
paigexox0 37
Omg thats something girls used to do in like, grade 6-7 LOL!
coried91 28
I never blocked you.... Why the **** would I do that? I called you a jackass because you were being really bitchy in the comment when I was further explaining myself and you just flew off the handle.
coried91 28
I do have pits. I never said that I was suprised their dog didn't rip their throat out. All I said was "I'm suprised they just sat there." Most dogs have some kind of reaction like barking or growling at least. That's why I said what I said.
Beansforbill 14
What the duck is a dog racist? Do they have feelings now?
Catahoulaqueen_fml 17
Pretty sure they've ALWAYS had feelings, smart ass
Enslaved 38
Hey, you trained him . . . or didn't.
skilova4lifezzz 19
I don't want to jump the fence.. I mean gun. But I think your plan with fido is up
DaMann360 19
Terrible attempt. Should've just said "gun" and never tried to put "fence" in its place.