Today, I hooked up with a girl from the bar. We went back to my place and started making out, I took off her shirt and bra and started kissing her breasts. I felt her chest hair tickle my tongue. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
RIP Beard
Today, I met a girl at a bar, we had a few drinks and really hit it off. We headed back to my place to get a little action. As she was riding me, she got rougher and rougher until she reached down and yanked a patch of hair right out of my beard. I yelped in pain and didn’t even finish. FML
Today, after months of Tinder-ing, first dates and being rejected, I finally was able to hook up with a girl. We met, we kissed, we danced and I took her back to my place. She then promptly tried to make out with my roommate. FML
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
Today, I was talking to the girl I really like, and she was telling me how crappy her day was. Trying to be nice, I gave her a back rub. I somehow managed to unhook her bra. FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the girl of my dreams. We went back to her place, and I explored every inch of her body; luscious lips, hourglass curves, genital warts... The worst part was when she got angry when I refused to continue, shouting, "No wonder you're still a virgin!" FML
Foreplay
Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, I started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection, all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML
Get away from me
Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wanted me as she pulled closer and closer. Eventually she pulled me in and licked my ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break your collar bone" in a seductive tone. FML
No kinkshaming, but…
Today, I was going to hook up with a new girl. She told me not to shower or wear deodorant when I came over, which I thought was a little odd but went along with. As we were getting warmed up, she started licking my sweaty armpit and moaning loudly. This is probably too weird to tolerate. FML
Slick move
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML
Top comments
kellster 2
Either she was a tranny, or you're really exaggerating. You do know that people have body hair, right? As in, the tiny, fuzzy kind? You'd probably better get over that pretty soon or you'll never have sex again.
icanhazlizard 0
I agree with 3 and 6. Hair is a natural part of being human. The girls are already expected to shave way more of their bodies than men have to be socially acceptable. I'm sick of hearing about how the hair on girls is disgusting. We shouldn't be rejected or made to go through ridiculously elaborate and time-consuming grooming routines because of it. It's *natural*. Get the **** over it.
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Comments (325)
miaumiau 0
I say FYL for being such a prick. She can always pluck those hairs out if she wants, you on the other hand will always be a douchebag. Sucks to be your sorry ass.
Weil 0
lol at #27. He doesn't know that he sucked delicious milk from his mom's **** when he was young.
curls_99 0
LOL @ 103
fkjiwefakris 0
106, same here haha. but everyone's different I suppose. and 27 I was gonna say "wtf?" but you're gay so it makes sense. still shouldn't judge what straight people do...
gradstdnt09 0
For all of you who say 'nasty' or 'ew'...how old are you people? 13? Should you even be on this website? Every person has body hair, you all are dumbasses if you say 'gross'. Maybe women should start saying 'gross' to your small penises or your bush of pubic hair? or your underarm hair? or your chest hair? Guess, what? Not all women like chest hair on guys (including myself), but we get over it because you can't effin help it...
eleanor_rigby 0
So you got to kiss the boobs of a girl you just met. And you're complaining about it because she has natural body hair. You're a jerk, grow up.
I_am_stupid_also 6
137 - "but we get over it because you can't effin help it..." No, you get over it because you are horny. The fact that large amounts of body hair is often a secondary sexual characteristic of men and not so much of women is going to make it easier for a woman to get over it. A guy does not have that biological advantage, so he may just decide to look elsewhere. Everyone has different sexual preferences, and this guy's preference is for less hair. Deal with it.
peopleplz2008 0
agree with #3 and 6
jeanniner 0
i didnt even know girls could have chest hair. WEIRD.
alexgirl 0
Ok, if was like thick coarse hair, then ew. I didn't think it grew that thick on woman. But if it's really thin, get over it. Everyone has it, it's a part of how we feel when things are on us. I have a little bit in between my breast too, but you can see it, unless you look really, really close. It's normal to have hair. I ain't shaving my boobs, and I don't expect anyone else to either.