Today, I helped two people find the central station on my way home. As a thank you, they mugged me and stole my wallet and iPod Touch. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML
Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML
Today, while I was walking to my car, I was mugged. Not only did they take my phone, wallet and watch, the extra few minutes taken in my journey meant that when I got to my car, I was given a parking ticket. FML
Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML
Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML
Today, I got mugged. After taking my cell phone, the guy politely said: "Thanks. Have a nice evening. Be careful on your way home." FML
Today, I fell going down the stairs to the subway platform during rush hour. Someone was kind enough to help me up and someone else was kind enough to steal my iPhone which had fallen out of my pocket and landed nearby. FML
Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML
Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML
Today, I helped a "blind" man across the street. He kindly said thank you and patted me on the back. Then, I went into a store and realized my wallet was missing. FML
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Top comments
LaFemmeQuiRit 3
OP, do you think you could help me move my couch into this van ?
DDPT2 4
911: What's you emergency? Guy: I've been mugged! 911: What did they take? Guy: They took my pockets.
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Comments (108)
alex1432 9
Stranger Danger!!!!
bmexoxo98 0
This Womens Not My Mother!
jwc93 0
your mother is sexxxxy
XxDevilxXGt 26
ydi for helping people you don't know. What were you thinking!!
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
You are not my mother. You are a Snort!
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
don't worry, be happy
fakeaccountX 6
o noez not the ipod touch
monkeyshorts22 4
I agree with 60;) a very potter musical FTW!!!
fatman217 0
at least you were safe....lol
nick7777 0
hi
hellyeahmirjam 2
well that's how pocketstealers (i don't know the word) work
kristir9426 0
pickpocket
DDPT2 4
911: What's you emergency? Guy: I've been mugged! 911: What did they take? Guy: They took my pockets.
ImaginaryFoe 1
That isn't how pickpockets work; that's how muggers work. Just sayin...
BDTM 0
#16 lol
fatman217 0
#16 you should be on comedy central because that's funny!!
Rizzen 27
#69 it wasn't that funny
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
do you mean Grand Central Station? maybe they mugged you cause they could tell you weren't from NYC. of course I didn't look at any of your geographic info, so I'm probably just being silly
jezzibell 0
yes, your just silly
DocBastard 40
Yes you're* just being silly. OP is from Denmark.
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
no, I think jezzibell meant that my "just" is silly. after all, that is what she wrote, doc. you shouldn't put words in people's mouths. ;)
XxDevilxXGt 26
well in that case they forgot the is in "your just IS silly" duh ^.^
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
#31, I was wondering who was gonna say something about that. actually I think she was using the slang term "just" to mean "justice". so she was calling my justice silly this may be because I use a gavel that squeaks when I bang it on the bench, or because I sometimes sentence offenders to 2 squirts from the water-squirting flower I wear on my lapel instead of handing down jail time. silly indeed.
hotrod14 0
this is exactly why I don't help people.
DudeImBetter 0
karmas finna get those fools, don't worry be happy.
Claytonic 0
I'm going to assume you meant gonna, and I agree.
DudeImBetter 0
Actually I was trying to sound black cause some black people say finna.
Claytonic 0
Wiggas ftw
DudeImBetter 0
I just think the word finna is funny.
ey3seecold 0
lmao true black ppl say that alot in Dtown
fatman217 0
I'm finna rob you wiggas
Jimboom 12
Next time don't have your Itouch on display. Oh and give them a fight along with your belongings
ImaginaryFoe 1
Sarcasm, right? It's hard to tell if you're foolishly telling OP to fight two assailants over things or if you're sarcastically saying that because you know it's terrible advice.
XxDevilxXGt 26
well if you know Escrima or kung fu or jiujitsu, or be trained in any fight style, it should be like a warm up. No problem ^^
BarneyA 0
Ouch iPod touch... Wouldn't have been bad if it was a crappy iPod.
HBoks 7
no shit, Sherlock-,-
youfailed18 0
People are douche-bags.
Shivermeshamrock 0
I never seen so many comments in a row get buried before.
Zebidee 9
Yes, the trolls are out in force tonight.
smarter1 0
if they stole your i pod touch then how are You one fml
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
"I'm a computah... Help, computah."
Unlucky_Gun 0
Computer, smartphone such as the android
iheartglasses 0
What is it with people saying, "Well you shouldn't have had Object X out on display!" The persons wallet was stolen too. Does that mean they were flashing their wallet around? Or maybe, JUST MAYBE, the OP recieved a call during his little tour. Chances are, the muggers found the phone while looking for the wallet. People need to stop acting so ignorant..
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Except it was an iPod, not an iPhone. :]