Today, I heard the sounds of women grunting in the living room. My husband knows I don't like him to watch porn, so I confronted him. He was masturbating to professional Women's tennis. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my neighbor threatened to call the cops if I didn't turn the volume down on my porno. I was only watching women's tennis. FML
Today, my husband walked in on me while I was masturbating and watching porn (yes women do it too). Now he thinks I’m unsatisfied with him or our sex life. All I wanted was a quick release. FML
Today, I caught my husband masturbating to porn. I screamed at him and demanded to know why he was masturbating when he has a wife to have sex with. He said, "Because you always reject me?" I was about to yell back when I realized he was right. I'm a terrible wife. FML
Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating. I thought it was hot and asked if I could join in. He threw me a disgusted look and screamed that I’d ruined the whole mood. Now we’re both unsatisfied. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend watches porn. Specifically, today, while I was in the shower. In the next room. We were alone in the house and he still chose porn. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML
Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML
Today, I started work cleaning a customer's pool. I think her husband watches too much porn because he keeps glaring at me from the windows, and I overheard him telling his wife that he knows what's "going on" and that he's "not gonna let it happen". FML
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Top comments
Freeze_fml 17
They play with balls more than you do, apparently.
maskedman 9
I guess now you have to take women's tennis away from, which leads to him teeing off to women's golf, which eventually leads to him polishing his pin to "women's" bowling. The masculine women of women's bowling makes an easy transition into homosexuality which leads to a divorce. Let your husband watch normal **** so that we can put a stop to this.
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Comments (209)
perdix 31
Everyone who says it's the OP's fault is wrong. It's her double-fault! ;)
me5 0
This is soft ****. **** nonetheless
Cjraven606 0
you should just get over it sometimes you just want to get off. Let your husband have some room
grandma_moses 0
either **** him or let him watch ****. actually, do both. prude.
choosemusic 0
at least he wasn't doing it to male tennis players? (;
SumKid_fml 0
Wow... This is almost level to the "Dora Masturbation" FML
sparxva 12
So basically this is "today my husband didn't watch ****" -- there is no fml here. Or are you such a control freak that you're upset because he still masturbates?
caffeinatedaspir 0
Not an FML **** him or let him watch ****. HE'S the one who should be writing in saying "my wife's a controlling bitch, she doesn't want me to masutrbate, but won't give it up either"
ShadowLor 19
I don't understand women's problem with guys watching ****. It is ****. A million times better than getting cheated on amiright? I don't care if my bf watches **** as long as he doesn't mind that if I want to, I will. Srsly, get some self esteem and understand that if you're not gonna be available 24/7 to get him off, he's gonna need a harmless alternative.
gilmorefan 17
I watch **** way more than my SO. I don't understand why most women are against it.
piggy94 0
that's what you get for being controllive