Today, I had to take care of my best friend while she was drunk. This meant changing her pee-soaked sheets, making her take a bath to get all the baby powder off, and making her put clothes on as she tried to run out the house naked. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I am now sleeping on the floor because my friend got super drunk at a small party then peed herself in her sleep. I was sleeping beside her and my clothes smell like pee. FML
Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML
Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML
Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML
Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML
Today, I woke up at a guy's house drunk and soaked in my own pee. I had passed out with all my clothes on. Since I was late for work and didn't have a change of clothes, all I could do was throw my jeans in the dryer. I had to sit all day at work in crusty pee pants. FML
Today, I drove my drunk sister home after a wild night of partying. She did not go to bed as I expected; instead, she laid in the bathtub and cried every time I left her. Now it's 3AM, and she's using her bra as a lasso for various objects in the room. The best part is I work in 4 hours. FML
Today, I was babysitting my friend's kids. One of the twin babies threw up all over my shirt and it went down my bra. Of course, I didn't have a change of clothes. FML
Today, I woke up in the shower at my coworker's house, with my clothes on and soaking wet. Apparently, the night before I drank too much and punched my best friend. The sad part is, I passed out on the couch, but somehow ended up in the shower, facing the wrong way. FML
Today, I woke up next to a slumbering girl I had just met the night before. She had all the covers on top of her and I was cold. Not only was I cold, but the sheets were really cold. So I got up and realized she'd peed a drunken night's worth of beer all over my sheets. FML
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Top comments
sportskid521 0
that has to suck but she was NAKED
Cupcaken 0
yeah... how old are you again?
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Comments (111)
instantmusic 4
LMAO, I remember havin' to do that for a friend, me and him cleaned off a 1.5L jug of Sailor Jerry. He tried to do #2 and passed out on the toilet. Me and his GF barreled him into the tub and washed out the vomit and such, then carried him into his bedroom. And no, its not an FML, its a delicious tidbit of info you can hold over her head, and something you can playfully remind her of later. :D
mimid_fml 1
you HAD to
JustKeepOnHatin 7
you sound like a pretty legit best friend(:
JesterMarcus 0
You don't have to do shit, she should learn her limits, and to take responsibility of her actions. She will never do that while being babied.
IsH3092 0
hey I'd do all those things happly ;)
Got_any_grapes1 4
I'd let her do that, just so I could see everybody else and their reaction.
heybert07 1
You're a better friend than I would've been!!
gregmoran 0
you should've let her run out of the house, she might not do it again.
Bearrr93 0
You guys? What kind of friend would she be if she wouldn't have done all that? Yeah she may have gotten ridiculously wasted and she doesss need to learn a lesson, but for all we know her doing all that for her might have even saved her best friend's life. Drunks are idiots. No telling what she could have gotten into. - I just wanted to point that out. And you are an AMAZING friend(:
aardvarkish 17
Next time this happens, call me!