Today, I had to moisturise my dog's testicles because they got sunburnt. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I decided to sunbathe in my backyard in an attempt to be healthy. The result? Insect bites over my body. Somehow, despite being fully clothed the entire time, my scrotum also received several bites. FML
Today, I was really badly sunburnt, so I put on some after-sun. The only type we have has glitter in it, and now I look like a sparkling tomato. FML
It's a doggy dog world
Today, I was bathing my dog at a self-serve dog wash at a pet store. The person next to me decided to express his dog's anal glands, and the vile, greasy, fish-smelling liquid hit me on the side of my face. FML
Today, I was badly sunburnt even after making it a point to apply a lot of sunscreen. My coworkers thought it amusing to slap me every chance they get. FML
Today, after applying sunscreen to myself every two hours, I still got sunburned. Through my clothes. FML
Nom nom nom
Today, I used a new body wash that smells like vanilla cookies. My dog spent the entire day chasing me around and trying to lick my arms. FML
Alexa, play "Hot Hot Hot" by The Cure
Today, we're in the middle of a heatwave. When I woke up this morning, I noticed that my scrotum was stuck to the side of my leg from all the perspiration. I had to actually peel it off. FML
You what now?
Today, I was called a wimp for getting a sunburn. FML
Life's a beach
Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML
Today, I walked in on my mother using a razor to shave my dad's cream-covered testicles. FML
Top comments
antbait11 0
did he redrocket on you?
ArtIsResistance7 1
lol. It rubs the lotion on the skin... I bet your dog will never look at you the same.
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Comments (237)
purplemnm 9
this is Bob Barker saying, "remember to spay or neuter your pet!"
jonny2x4 0
Just put a glove on, then take a cold shower afterwards.
zephyrnok 9
YDI for not putting sunblock on his balls first.
RockstarChickxD 1
Ewww! That's pretty fckin gross.
iplaylax 0
I smell a porno
thebluewizard 14
Wow, how did this get put through with the horrible grammar?
randomviolet 0
ok this isn't such a fml but ur lucky u hadn't took a piece of floss haggen out of a dogs butt!!
nerdsgetmehot 23
I kind of doubt that you HAD to...
knockout666 0
loolll aw man EWWW ahahaha
vanillapup 0
hahahahahaaaa !!