Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML
Today, I was in my bedroom with my boyfriend and we were kissing. My mom then came into my room and started shouting at my boyfriend for cheating on her. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office, where my mother happens to work. When my doctor tried to prank her by saying I have chlamydia, my mother laughed and said she didn't believe it, adding, "Have you even seen the way she interacts with boys?" FML
Today, I went to the hospital due to extreme sickness. My boyfriend saw this as an opportune time to take another girl out since I was "otherwise preoccupied." FML
Today, I crawled into my mom's room to tell her my stomach was in massive pain. She ended up throwing me out of the room while spraying me with Lysol. My appendix was about to burst and I needed surgery. FML
Today, my mom got angry that I wasn't responding to her texts. I couldn't because I was in the dentist's chair. She'd dropped me off, and after returning from errands, sent the text from the waiting room. FML
Today, while my girlfriend is in hospital, I'm left at home with her mom. What I didn't know is that her mom's medication makes her do strange things. I learned that right away when she took a seat next to me, completely naked, on the couch. My girlfriend's mom is my grandmother's age. FML
Today, I went to my doctor for a check-up. It started with the doctor lifting my shirt up to check my heartbeat, and ended with my gran starting a fistfight over his "perverted ways." FML
Today, my mother made me see the doctor to see if I had irritable bowel syndrome, on the account of how often I go to the restroom. I then had to admit I only go in there to get away from my family. My doctor thought it was hilarious. My mom didn't. FML
Today, I went to the hospital emergency room to visit my boyfriend who had badly sliced his leg open. It ended with me being admitted with a possible head trauma, after hitting my head on the wall and floor as I collapsed at the sight of his wound. FML
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Top comments
ashleynonymous 0
On the plus side, your medical bills no longer have to come out of your college fund!
diemileyjk 0
haha ur momma's a playa XD
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Comments (99)
imratedG 5
congrats to your mom xD evidently, people assume your mom isn't single, perhaps she is ':D but lol. that was funny X)
HelloKandace 0
welp, I guess you have a new rich step-daddy !
great_nate 26
Dr. Step Dad