Today, I had an unbearable itch on my foot that I could not make go away with my nails, so I grabbed the stapler in my drawer to scratch it with. Bad idea. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidentally stapled my finger to a piece of paper. It hurt, but I took it out and went to restaple it. I did it again. FML
Today, while joking with my coworkers about how I shouldn't be trusted with a stapler because I managed to accidentally staple my finger last week, I stapled another finger. FML
Today, I put aftershave on my fingers to encourage myself to stop biting my nails. I absentmindedly rubbed my eye a few minutes later. It burnt like hell. FML
Today, I was clipping my nails. When I got to my toenail, the whole thing somehow ripped right out. I'm in agony. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure, and they used some sort of scrubby thing that really tickled my feet. When I couldn't take it any more, I accidentally kicked the lady who was doing my nails in the face. FML
Today, I was playing my guitar and felt something like an itch under my foot, so I attempted to scratch it by rubbing against the floor. The big cockroach made a very distinct "crunch". FML
Today, I was working at Staples and organizing some notebooks. All of a sudden, I jumped up because of a sharp pain in my back. A little girl had grabbed a stapler and stapled my back. FML
Today, I accidentally cut myself with a razor blade on my toe. Not only does it sting really badly, but it reinforces the fact that I have abnormally hairy toes that need to be shaved. FML
Today, I was in a rush, so I was removing my nail polish while using the toilet. Everything was going fine, until I used the toilet paper in my hand to wipe. It was covered in nail polish remover. It still burns. FML
Today, I noticed one of my toenails was getting super long, so I cut it. In doing so, I accidentally ripped it off and it started bleeding. As I went to get something to stop it from bleeding, I got a huge splinter in my little toe, causing a painful infection. I think I should just go back to bed. FML
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Top comments
flamegrilled123 3
How could that possibly go wrong?
Greendaycheese 12
What a genius idea!
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Comments (185)
zuzupetalsYO 11
They have medicine for athletes foot ya know.
caplox 6
Next time use the scissors.
Hylia_fml 6
Sometimes I wonder: "Who the hell thinks a stapler would be a good thing to scratch their foot with... and if that wasn't enough, why would they post this online? So they could be mocked by everyone?" But that doesn't necessarily relate to O.P.... No...
FalconWhitaker 20
Ouch. Not a good idea. Maybe you're allergic to something?
VenaSera 0
Did it ever occur that that could possibly hurt?
3040evan 2
Wow you're the reason why I have a job, people like you are job security for me
redwingsfan88 9
You don't say?
KalCountry76 12
why a stapler and not a fork?
SenorOlive 3
You should probably see a doctor. Not about the assumed stapler holes in you, but the most likely mental disability you have been suffering from.
sointenceXD 0
YOLO ha Just kidding that sucks sorry op