Today, I had an ovarian cyst rupture at work, causing sudden severe stomach cramps; this caused my bowels to release everything right then and there, while on the phone with a customer, in the middle of the call center surrounded by 200 other sales reps. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, I had such a violent coughing fit that my stomach emptied itself all over the floor while at my sales job. FML
Today, at work, I had a coughing fit so bad I actually shat myself. What felt like a gallon of liquid crap poured down my trouser leg onto the floor. I work in a competitive office and this happened in front of 30 spiteful coworkers who love posting pics online. FML
Today, I had an upset stomach all day at work. When lunch break came, I rushed to the bathroom. Just as I turned into an unstoppable human whoopie cushion, a co-worker walked in. He heard the entire arse symphony, and just asked, "What the fuck, dude?!" as he left. FML
Today, I had to call in sick to work because I was experiencing bowel distress. I called my manager's phone directly so no one else would know of my embarrassment. She put me on speakerphone, and I only realized when the juvenile laughter started. FML
Today, after disappearing for an unusually long period of time, my boss called the store phone while sitting on the toilet. Turns out she'd started bleeding uncontrollably from the arse, and as the only other female staff member, she needed me to go help her. FML
Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML
Today, I was in class and felt a sharp pain in my stomach. I began to scream and cry because the pain was horrible, so the teacher called 911. After being rushed to the hospital, I was told that "I had gas cramps and would be fine." My whole class was listening on speakerphone to make sure I was ok. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, at work in a call center, I went into my locker to get my pain pills from a recent surgery. When I opened the bottle, half my pills spread all over the floor. My boss walked by and said, "I knew it!" FML
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Top comments
randomname0151 4
Wow, that's really awful. Hope you're ok.
Kitastropheee 12
Why are you guys hitting the you deserve it button? She doesn't deserve that at all! No one does!
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Comments (146)
ohrlly7457 7
Holy shit ( pun not intended )
unknown_user5566 27
Well, did you make the sale? ;) That sounds terrible though, OP. I hope you work with nice people who don't give you too hard of a time about this.
subwaysurfers 13
He'd be lucky if out of 200 people not one gives him a hard time.
blubberfish 10
Her
eggmarie 25
Apparently men have ovaries now. All those hours sitting in anatomy class wasted. Who knew.
perdix 31
ABC, Always Be Closing. It's a massive call center. Nice people don't even apply. They just hire soulless sociopaths who call you at dinner trying to sell you shit you don't need. Your thoughts are kind, but I think she works with a bitter, desperate bunch.
dead_insects 18
soulless sociopaths you say?! I KNEW I got hired at my call center for a reason!! *sharpens my blade slowly*
Big_lama6 7
Well someone was bound to say it
gabrayal 10
It could be worse ! I don't know how... But I'm pretty sure it could be worse.
VIPwhenever 15
When she got up to walk crap could've trailed out her pant leg and left a trail right to her and when people followed the trail and she didn't lock the bathroom doorand opened it on her naked waist down cleaning her underwear in the sink.
Cryptic17_fml 4
Way to get graphic and I think she would do that in a stall not out in the open like you , an idiot
perdix 31
Yada, yada, yada ... Shitty situation. Unless your customer has a Smell-o-phone, they don't really give a shit about what happened in your pants. On the other hand, your co-workers have reason #286 why it sucks to be a telemarketer.
4everblackjack 10
OH DEAR LORD. Just imagining it makes me shiver T.T FYL indeed OP. Hope you feel better though!
Ashley0911 8
The other sells reps at least came to your aid, didn't they?
Cryptic17_fml 4
I hope the odds were ever in your favor on the way to the bathroom
momogal 22
I have no idea how anyone can say OP deserved it. Cysts are not caused by anything she did. She was born with the disorder and can't help when she gets cysts. Even the best treatments can fail to stop the cysts entirely. Or if the OP is like me, she can't take birth control pills because she is too sensitive to the hormones. OP, I am so sorry you had to go through something so embarrassing. I really hope your coworkers and boss were understanding and let you go get treated for the rupture. Feel better soon!
zandalee 20
I agree. Those cysts bloody hurt! My daughter and I have both had to have them removed from our ovaries... Not much fun. The only thing between my daughter and a world of pain is the pill called Dianne. It's actually stopped her cysts completely!
zandalee 20
Oh and Momogal, I hope your life's better now .. You sound like a lovely person. Has been a bitch of a year hasn't it!?
zandalee 20
They took my daughters appendix out just in case when they opened her up to have a look. She was in so much pain and my baby was only 15!!
baronsmommy 14
This should get you out of work for at least a week, by the time you go back to work it won't be nearly as embarrassing...maybe...