Today, I had a new client on my massage list. Two of my fingers got stuck in the thick coat of hair covering his back. I had to stop myself from making grunting noises whilst extricating them. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, at work as a massage therapist, I pulled down the guy's blanket slightly to massage his lower back. There were shit stains spreading from his ass crack all the way to his mid-back. When I told him, he wanted me to massage there anyway. FML
Today, while waxing a client's chest, I forgot to have him turn his head. When I ripped the strip, I punched him in the face. FML
Today, I got a massage. Just as I was starting to relax, the massage therapist drooled on my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend was playing with my hair, when his hand got caught. He ended up ripping out a handful of hair trying to get it free. FML
Today, while taking a shower, my back hair caused so much friction against the bar of soap, it stuck for a good second before coming free. FML
Today, I was listening to a client's heartbeat with a stethoscope, when I noticed one of my hairs had fallen on her chest. I tried to brush it off, but it didn't move, so I went to pick it up with my fingers. That's when I found it it wasn't my hair, it was hers... and it was still attached. FML
Today, I was at my friend's house, when she commented that her dog's fur kept getting tangled because of its length. I reached over to tickle his tummy, felt a big tangled knot and agreed that he needed a good grooming. Then I realized what I'd grabbed wasn't fur. FML
Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML
Today, I had to give a massage to an obese person with rank smelling fungus growing in between their skin folds. They tipped me two dollars. My hands still smell. FML
Today, I tried to use a fancy new hairstyling tool and ended up getting my hair tangled in it. I had to cut a chunk of my hair off to free myself. FML
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Top comments
kyu_Q 19
You should recommend that Chewbacca start waxing
DocBastard 40
Beard - sexy Moustache - creepy Chest hair - manly Back hair - The most disgusting thing ever ew ew ew ew ew ew
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Comments (77)
Eahae3 12
Yikes that's a hairy mess!
efettes 19
#1 was pretty close, but used mess instead of situation.
efettes 19
Gah! That was supposed to go to #3 :(
kyu_Q 19
You should recommend that Chewbacca start waxing
mn_shr 22
Horrible mental image there
SoliDSt33L 33
That's a hairy situ- *slap* NO! Leave! These types of comments don't belong here. I'm just waiting for someone to say it.
Rainhawk94 27
That's sounds like a hairy situation!
RedX1000FML 11
#20 You dun ****** up.
Rainhawk94 27
Ill slither back to my hole
MidnaLink 35
Don't pick on the poor boy! He's new to our ever growing tribe and knows nothing of our laws and customs.
extrasnipes 22
did you give him a free wax? so it doesnt happen again.
AshaaFerreira 22
Forget the noises I would have probably barfed all over him...... Gross
perdix 31
I guess wtih all that Jack Links money and getting messed with, Sasquatch has the stress and the wealth to get massages,
codlover23 6
The picture in my head I created is very disturbing to me....
Kataclysm97 32
Is your new client by any chance Saskwatch?
RedX1000FML 11
Sasquatch*
RoboCunnilingus 23
I believe his name is Sass K. Watts
Kataclysm97 32
Oh, oops! Thanks for the correction :)
fucMyLifeSoHard 18
66- Why did I laugh so damn much?
DocBastard 40
Beard - sexy Moustache - creepy Chest hair - manly Back hair - The most disgusting thing ever ew ew ew ew ew ew
nemeteer 4
Most accurate thing I've read today
RedPillSucks 33
You gotta shave your back hair first Noor.
Merylwen 24
I really don't understand that. I mean, I don't find thick "back fur" attractive, but it's not like one chooses to have hair or not. Yes, he could wax it, but why should he? It's not like it's unnatural. Plus, how is it disgusting? It's hair, not dirt. People all have different looking bodies, I can't see the use for bullying everyone to fit a certain standard.
LowExpectations 30
My hair grows unevenly on my face and torso, much to my disappointment. And yet down south of my waist I'm like a damn ape! So I have to agree with #72, we don't get to choose our hair patterns. Can't blame a poor guy for body fuzz some may or may not agree with.
miketheginger 2
I think that man needs a waxing