Today, my "friend" came over. I caught him trying to steal my iPod on the way out. Proud of myself for catching him, I asked him to leave, only to realize that I had forgotten to actually take the iPod back from him before he left. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend stole a guy's cookie. As revenge, he stole my iPod. FML
Today, I was over at a friend's place until very late. He had stolen my keys as a joke at some point, but by the time I noticed, he was too drunk to remember where he'd hidden them. FML
Today, I had three things stolen: my phone, my iPod, and my girlfriend. All by the same guy. FML
Today, I got caught trying to steal my own cat back from my neighbor. FML
Today, I walked into what I thought was my friend's apartment, dropped my backpack on the couch, and started complaining about work. A complete stranger then walked out of the kitchen holding a sandwich, saw me, then yelled "HELP!" I apologized, grabbed my bag, and somehow took his TV remote with me. FML
Today, I came home to find that my roommate had picked my lock and stolen my new laptop. When I tried to take it back, he called the police. They sided with him since he had also taken the receipt, which was "proof" that it was his. FML
Today, while I was taking a break at work, someone stole my iPod from my desk. I work in a police station. FML
Today, I caught my "best friend" on my laptop, copying my girlfriend's nudes onto his flash drive. FML
Today, I handed my friend his phone, telling him he'd forgotten it. He responded by taking his phone out of his pocket and showing it to me. I then realized I was holding MY phone. FML
Today, I found a guy getting out of my car with my GPS. He started running and I chased him. We eventually reached a dead end and he gave it back to me. I took it back from him and said, "Sorry..." FML
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Top comments
XxNINJA_28xX 8
Kinda defeats the purpose
Chloe555_fml 27
Way to go, sport!
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Comments (86)
Chloe555_fml 27
Way to go, sport!
\ 28
It must take balls of lead to steel so blatantly.
Gearden 8
It must take a brain of lead to steal so blatantly. He is an idiot and an douche bag.
Ambient25 25
It must take steel of lead to brain so blatantly
Applesarefum 9
#18 it must take a brain of lead to say something that stupid.
Riku714 25
#31 you have restored some of my faith in humanity
scooterdude720 19
I'm so confused.
\ 28
Wow, I misspelled "steal" and got buried. Sorry about the bad, unintentional pun
XxNINJA_28xX 8
Kinda defeats the purpose
Ambient25 25
We've all had moments of forgetfulness though so we can relate. I remember a few weeks ago I had my Ipad in one hand and a glass of water in the other. I wanted to throw my Ipad onto my bed but used the wrong hand....I'm a retard -_-
jipster 11
What kind of friends do you have OP?
AnOriginalName 19
Friends who are so desperate that they'll swipe a few rolls of deodorant. And iPods, apparently.
Claytoad 5
Rolls of deodorant?
Cazz91 21
Sadly, I understand the deodorant feeling #17 pointed out. It surprised me as well when I found out what was happening with all of my deodorant.
nightbirdblue 27
It is a reference to another FML.
skrai9898 8
Shitty ones.
Simbaby 23
Thieves and hookers ....
vanessuhm 15
What a horrible friend
Ian7890 23
This wouldn't happen to be the person that made the fml saying they were going to steal deodorant from a friend was it?
Enslaved 38
"Why don't you make like a tree and get out of here?"
Dracoboxer357 36
Back to the Future II reference, ftw! :D I'm such a movie geek... ;P
NeatNit 33
Not that that's not one awesome quote, but how the **** is it relevant?!
Gearden 8
it's back to the future. It never has to be relevant because it's awesome.
Enslaved 38
#21 OP --asked him to. . . "leave" Think, McFly! Think!
bryan_1989 14
It's also a Boondock Saints reference. "Why don't you make like a tree and get the f*ck out of here!" Awesome movie.
LowExpectations 30
These comments are about as funny as a screen door on a submarine.
Slimbo305 11
That sux
DorklyComicFan 8
ya it duz
Mshrodes 13
I'm pretty sure #14 here was ironic.
lengi123 18
Who are you talking to 26?
Mshrodes 13
To the people who thumbed him down.
hghrider123456 9
if only ther was a button for that opinion of yours...
Palirose 22
How do you FORGET to take it back? I don't believe your story, OP.
junkman6 22
You have "friends" who steal from you AND weren't smart enough to get the iPod back. Common sense is definitely not your strong suit OP.
ilytyvm 25
maybe that's why he has "friends" who steal
BradTheBrony 19
Maybe that's what he was implying.
tyler384 6
"Trying" to steal? Looks like he got away with it. Next time chase him down and get it back.
Charryboo 11
whattheactualfuck.
Dracoboxer357 36
Oh, it's called the Space Bar. It spaces things. ;P
Charryboo 11
What if I want to be different and not use them!?
Chloe555_fml 27
Good luck getting far in life.
Charryboo 11
this is an FML website, who gives a shit. It's not a job or a university class LOL.
blackbeltpsycho 16
I wish I could thumb up #76
LowExpectations 30
Good lord, YouTube comments are unbearable.