Today, I gave my husband an early Christmas present: Santa-themed lingerie. He got angry and called me selfish, for "using" him as an excuse to get myself nice stuff. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I surprised my wife with some new lingerie for our upcoming anniversary, thinking she would like it. Instead of a thank you, I got an ungrateful attitude from her instead. FML
Today, my husband still hadn't gotten me anything for Christmas, so I bought and wrapped my own presents. Then I had my husband write 'to me, from him' on them so that I won't be embarrassed in front of my family on Christmas when it comes time to open presents. FML
Today, I opened my Christmas presents with my husband. One of the things he got me was a ball gag. "Yeah," he said with a grin, "That one's more for me but I didn't wanna buy myself headphones." Cue our son asking me what it was. FML
Today, I gave my wife a $900 necklace as a special Christmas gift. She gave me a set of Star Wars pajamas. As it turns out, I was more excited to wear my gift than she was to wear hers. FML
Today, I wrapped my boyfriend's Christmas presents for him, because he was too lazy to do it himself. This included my own present. FML
Today, I got my husband his favorite candy and wine for Valentine's Day. He got mad and accused me of doing it to "bribe" him into bed, since he hasn't been wanting sex lately. When I asked how he could say something so cruel, he admitted that he's been cheating on me, and my gift made him feel guilty about it. FML
Today, my husband came home with a Christmas gift from a coworker. It's the same thing I got him. FML
Today, just like every other celebratory day (like my anniversary or birthday) I ordered my own Christmas present. My husband doesn't get it. I tried to explain. He openly admits he has no idea what I like and has no interest in learning, but wants me to have something to open so he won't look bad. FML
Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML
Today, I received from my husband for Christmas the body lotion that only he uses. And nothing else. FML
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Top comments
LeeRed 15
Well I won't call lingerie a present, its more like gift wrapping paper. hehe
HowieDoIt 21
He's an angry elf!
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Comments (86)
gadgetmaster 10
Hey, giving yourself in something sexy and new should be a much appreciated gift. What an ass
mykelinva 4
maybe he should get a lump of coal in his stocking....and a tube of hand cream...
obviousboy 8
I'm sure you can find someone who'll enjoy it.
sheethapins 13
Yes, cheat on your husband so at least someone appreciates the purchase. Good job, sounds like the perfect plan. What could possibly go wrong?
ThatGirlxx 6
Guys, he was joking. See the funny side. Gosh.
H00ks 19
He's right. You should return it and buy him a huge bottle of lotion and Kleenex. Maybe that'll brighten his Christmas spirit.
ballbearing 10
Oh! Exactly my thoughts!
amillionbucks 5
Well, he's right.
ironhead_fml 20
Santa has a present for you.
Denny1 15
He needs to step his game up
alfred07 18
What a strange man.
daytoday21 10
I mean it's a present for both of you, but he shouldn't have been mean about it
exo_went_insane 12
If your husband doesnt appreciate you and your lingerie, I know someone who would.. very much ;)
SoylentCandycorn 10
"Thank you, anonymous perver on FML! Let me get revenge on my husband by ******* you! That'll teach him!" Said nobody, ever.
barefootchic 6
Your picture after that sentence gave me the shivers...