Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, because I'm too "high maintenance" during the holidays. Not to worry, though; he's willing give me another chance sometime after Valentine's day. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm "high maintenance." I'd only asked him to use deodorant and brush his teeth. He hasn't had a shower in over a week. FML
Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He wants us to stay friends, though, so he can continue to use my coffee maker. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm too nice. Apparently, me being nice to him makes him feel guilty. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML
Today, I got a phone call from my boyfriend breaking things off with me. He waited until the day after Christmas because he wanted all his presents. And he got me nothing. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me the best birthday ever, then promptly broke up with me at midnight to get back with his ex, because he "didn't want to ruin my special day." FML
Today, I hadn’t seen my boyfriend since New Year’s Day, then we went out for lunch Valentine's Day and at the end of the date he didn’t even kiss me. He texted me at midnight tonight saying he sorry he’s a jerk and broke up with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because he wanted to make the most of his 1 month X-Box Live coupon. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
DesiLikesHerSome 1
He's not worth it.
mom2pen 4
And you'll give him another chance when they sell ice water in hell.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (164)
DesiLikesHerSome 1
He's not worth it.
princessbits 17
You're ex-boyfriend sounds like a douche
Brooksyp88 0
I think he just doesn't want to buy you presents.
Damn_Hippster 11
Just in time fir steak and ******** day! (march 14)
Damn_Hippster 11
30- you illiterate bastard, I do believe you meant for... Not fir.
Renesaga 8
Thank you, 19, for that brilliant observation. In other news, the sky is blue.
GriffithsGirl95 0
Wow that's not a true boyfriend; this will just keep yapping and it's not right, he is playing head games and needs to get a life before deserving someone like you.
drooller 9
Nice one :D
rallets 23
genius idea, no gifts, no worry but what about your birthday?
tatababe 1
Kick his cheap ass
AlaskanEskimo34 0
tool
B0NER 2
Man with his priorities straight
derpster 7
or maybe his priorities are homosexual.
Derpstra 3
Derpster has an awesome name.
derpster 7
64 are you my soulmate?
Jaxx66 21
I put my hand up on your hip. When I herp, you derp, we derp! >_> sorry. Came to mind, had to share.
derpster 7
you guys are making me derp with herping happiness.
Artz94_fml 16
He is ridiculous !
graham11 14
40- hell no. Ridiculously selfish!
graham11 14
61- sushi or oysters?
graham11 14
90- **** YES
flockz 20
my mom packs that in my lunch everyday.
Kefka91 15
Yum... Cyanide...
graham11 14
111- I prefer a mercury- based sauce.
tylersign 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
No man likes to spend half his paychecks on women.. Some are just good at hiding it.
TXjuggalo972 6
If I loved a girl I would spend every penny I got (with the exeption of the money for bills) on her
yetanotherginger 19
then how would you save for a future together?
Cheergal910 15
The amount shouldnt matter. If what I got for christmas from my BF was a card saying "I love you" I'd be perfectly happy. (:
teddy4nyy 13
65 don't give him any ideas
mrsayuso 0
Quick some one grab my epi pen, apparently number 16 did not realize I was allergic to bullshit.
I_Bite 22
I'd rather buy a $5 pizza and have a picnic on the lounge room floor watching a movie for Valentines day :) If you really love someone you don't need the expensive gifts, you just need to spend time together :)
SailorSolaris 43
I quite agree. I prefer small, well thought out gifts, or something handmade, over something really expensive.
SailorSolaris 43
I quite agree. I prefer small, well thought out gifts, or something handmade, over something really expensive.
crchara 3
that's ****** up
mom2pen 4
And you'll give him another chance when they sell ice water in hell.
TheClumsiest 0
um, what exactly is your profile pic?
angeljewlz 7
I think it's a pig with wings.... OP that sucks, but hopefully you're not really high-maintenance, that you expect to be showered in jewelry just because you were in a relationship.
broski4life 0
Isn't there a cold level of hell?
eatsleepjb 8
I hope you don't give him another chance after valentines day because he sounds like a douche
graham11 14
OP needs a better valentine!! *accepting applications bow*
drunkandfml 11
Kick his ass on Valentines Day
Buttsexpirate 9
Shouldn't have asked for that extra kiss. Threw his whole budget out of wack. If need be I'll give him a surprise for ya OP just lead him to my ship.
FelixVC1 21
Well, it doesn't cost a lot to get a little something, just goes to show he's a douche really. Move on and find someone else!
DocBastard 40
I told Every1luvsboners the same thing when he asked me for the Anal Intruder 5000 with the optional Extra Large Fist. Who the hell do you think you are?!
Perdition 4
^ ...?