Today, I gave my girlfriend a small stun gun I bought for her. She mentioned how she thought it was ''cute'', though it probably wouldn't help if someone was after her. She then put the tazer to my chest. When I woke up, she told me how it was my fault, for buying it for her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I got tased, with the same TASER I bought my girlfriend to use on people trying to rob her. FML
Today, my girlfriend totally emasculated me and made me a laughing stock when we got mugged and, instead of just handing over her purse like the guy said, she took out a stun gun and used it on him while I freaked out and cried. Now all my friends are laughing at me. FML
Today, I gave my sister a stun gun for her birthday since she recently had a couple "close calls" walking home from work late at night. She was so excited and thankful that she wanted to express her gratitude by shocking me to see if it really worked. FML
Today, my mom decided to try her new taser on me while I was asleep on the couch. FML
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, I spotted my girlfriend in a store. She didn't notice me, so I went behind her, put my hands over her eyes, and said "Guess who." I got an elbow to the groin and mace to the face. While I was rolling on the ground in pain, she simply said, "Serves you right" and walked away. FML
Today, I bought my daughter a rape alarm after she had a near-miss with a creep following her to her part-time job. As soon as I handed it to her in the car park, she accidentally set it off and one of her coworkers put me in a rather painful headlock and threw me to the ground, breaking my arm. FML
Today, I woke up to a punch in the face. My girlfriend said it was because she dreamed that I'd bought all her friends Taco Bell but didn't bring her anything. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Tubasaurus 0
I think a safety test should be required to handle stun guns. Too many stupid people think they are harmless.
DameGreyWulf 1
I don't care what kind of place you live (dangerous or not) or how low voltage it was, it is awesome you bought her a stun gun. I would dance if anyone ever bought me one. So awesome. FYL for bitchy girlfriend, you were only thinking of her.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (125)
Gadget3440 0
As long as she made it up to you I say it's not an FYL. It's not like she put it to your balls and made you impotent and sterile. Now That would have been an FYL
bobertbarker 0
wow cuz, ur girlfriend is a retard... all girls think stun guns are toys.. those n00bs
DeathShad0 1
Now do it to her to show her how that thing feels. Those hurt like a bitch.
xxXChiiXxx 2
FYL. I'd love to have a stun gun! ;D
portablecupid 3
That's lame. I wish my boyfriend would give me a taser, I really want one lol.
ooouuuccchhh 0
ydi for buying her a taser.
Guairdean 0
Dump her. There's no need to date someone that insensitive and unstable. Try to get the tazer back, but don't push it or you'll probably get tazed again.
shadow_moses 0
dump her, what a stupid bitch. oh and make sure you dump her over the phone when shes away from her tazer
cmac86 24
dumb blonde moment. she's probably too stupid to realize when she's being attacked.
jt8787 0
you're an idiot!