Today, I found the perfect opportunity to throw my husband a surprise party since he thought I was away on a business trip. He came home with a hooker. Surprise! FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband planned a surprise party. He would pretend to forget my birthday, I'd leave in a rage and go to my best friend's house, where the surprise party would be. It would have been a great plan had I gone to her house and not my side dick's apartment. Now I'm totally fucked. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my husband by bringing home a case of beer and renting us a porno. He decided to surprise me by telling me he was leaving me for his pregnant girlfriend. FML
Today, I threw myself a surprise party. FML
Today, I just found my husband on Craigslist. He's working away from home, and he's looking to give a blowjob. FML
Today, after spending a week defending my marriage to everyone, I found out my husband has an addiction I never knew about. Hookers. FML
Today, my wife told me she had a surprise for me when I came home. Surprise to me means sex, not a new puppy. FML
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML
Today, I ran into my husband and his mistress. He was picking her up at the airport. I was catching a flight to a conference with my boss. He had flowers for her, and his arm around her. My boss knows my husband as well. FML
Today, I caught my soon to be husband screwing our wedding planner. FML
Today, I found out the girl my husband's been calling "Sister" isn't actually his sister, but instead a hooker whose work name is "Sister". FML
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Top comments
MCRaddict15 15
What a douche. He was more than lucky to have someone as compassionate as you. Oh well, his loss.
dude1122332 9
I think you have another surprise for him right? Like some papers..
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Comments (168)
simsgirlgem 25
Divorce him make sure you get a good attorney so he can't get the good china or the Mercedes
mspiggy3712 11
I would chew that scumbag out for being such a dueche!
sazzums 10
Being an ex-hooker myself (it is legal here) I can understand that you are very angry and upset. I will say, from personal experience, married men come often to see a working girl, and many of them actually just want the company, some want to live a fetish that their wives wont partake in, and only very very few come because they are just horny. Also, I hate the whole 'Get yourself checked' comments. I find them highly rude and a huge lie. I have NEVER in my life had ANY STD or STI, as same as all the girls I have worked with and become friends with, I am cleaner than some friends, and I take exceptionally good care of myself, and will refuse a guy if there is anything off-putting that makes me worry for my own sexual health.
ADBurns 22
Awkward...
sam_teddy 2
I'm so sorry that your good intentions were met with that. I hope he realises that he just lost someone very precious.